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Kagro in the Morning


Jul 24, 2020

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Kagro in the Morning welcomes the new Washington Football Team and their new mascot, “Mascot”. Goooo “Team”! 

David Waldman also celebrates the return of the celebrated author of The Tribalization of Politics: How Rush Limbaugh's Race-Baiting Rhetoric on the Obama Presidency Paved the Way for Trump, Ian Reifowitz. (The book that makes a great back-to-school gift!)

Donald Trump retreats from Jacksonville, his no-doubt stubby little tail between his legs, because Republicans are afraid of catching the sniffles. Too bad, it looked like it was going to turn into a real Klanbake, except without anyone as woke as say... Calvin Coolidge.

When someone says “both sides are just as bad”, what they are trying to tell you is, that they have determined that they are better than everyone else. They might be. But, never let anyone compare Democrats with Republicans, because there really is no comparison.

Black lives matter. Maybe we are all catching on, finally. However, it isn’t that all houses matter when there are fires, but all fires matter and can endanger everyone eventually.

Nothing brings down neighborhood crime like a parade of jackboots, and Donald Trump purports to plan to send tens of thousands of pairs to certain Democratic strongholds in certain swing states around a certain election season. Steven Miller says troops should, in fact, be greeted as liberators, if they know what’s good for them. Steven Miller’s grandmother won’t have Steven dirtying her sofa during the holidays anymore. On the sad side, it’s because she died of COVID-19, so the rest of the Millers will still have to look at him.

Immigration, healthcare and various other problems will also be fixed in the next 9 days.

Michael Cohen was put into solitary confinement to shut him up about Donald Trump. Now, he’s being released from prison to shut him up about Donald Trump. Vladimir Putin is probably wondering whatever happened to all of our 5th floor windows.

Matt Gaetz improperly sent tens of thousands of taxpayer dollars to a limited liability company linked to a speech-writing consultant who was ousted from the Trump administration, who will soon be introduced as his son.

Ohio House Speaker Larry Householder laundered a $60 million bribe to shift billions of dollars to individuals around payday-loan, coal, and nuclear interests. That is the what it took for him to get caught. Imagine what he did on his way to working up to that score.