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Kagro in the Morning

Jul 28, 2020

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It’s been a while since Markos Molulitsas presented the first Daily Kos as a series of sung limericks set to David Waldman’s lute accompaniment. Each update has improved the accessibility, interactivity, readability, and style over the last… although you might not feel that yet. You’ll miss this version when it’s gone!  

Tuesday KITMs still feature Joan McCarter, because you know we don’t want a riot!

If you want to relive classic web design, head over to (when it’s up). Dr. Stella Immanuel, the leader of Fire Power Ministries believes in alien DNA, demon sperm, hydroxychloroquine and Donald Trump. Donald also believes in hydroxychloroquine and Trump, so he was happy to spread Dr. Stella’s word, which has now been removed from YouTube, Twitter, and Facebook. Nothing will ever shake Donald Trump’s deep and abiding faith in Donald Trump, Donald’s adoration to the glory of Trump could never be usurped by mere human hardships and lamentations... especially yours.

Which brings us back to coronavirus, and those people that just don’t “get it” until they catch it. Arkansas Senator Jason Rapert introduced a bill to ban gay marriage, and unfortunately hasn’t yet been caught in a gay affair. However, Rapert did call coronavirus a hoax, and now he’s in the hospital for Covid-19. At least 10 in the Tennessee legislature have tested positive for coronavirus. It sure will take us a long time if every Republican has to learn this way. A judge has determined that belching virus at each other is not free speech, so that’s a start.

Meanwhile, more than two dozen lifeguards working the Jersey shore have tested positive for COVID-19. A couple hundred students have been exposed to coronavirus while taking their ACT tests. And, Ohio’s never been the same without Dr. Amy “Action!” Acton.

If you’ve been reading this wondering, “Wait! There seems to be a lot of money to be made here! How can I cash in?”, well, there are plenty of success stories to consider. Take for instance, the Florida man that applied for $4 million in Paycheck Protection Program (PPP) loans, and was able to buy himself a brand-new Lamborghini Huracán! If you run a hospital in a Trump supporting state with a Trump supporting mayor you can say goodbye to supplies and equipment shortages… until you do, then tough luck. Finally, a National Guard officer whistleblows on the Trump-Barr Lafayette Park photo op.

Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer reject Mitch McConnell’s COVID-19 bill. Bernie Sanders isn’t that big a fan either. Republicans are in disarray, but not in a big hurry to figure out the bill’s particulars. Donald Trump seems to be the only one ready to go for the bill, but in case he balks they can always take a chunk out of Social Security. If people can’t live on present unemployment insurance, Republicans wonder how they’ll do on less.

Trump’s announcement that he would pitch at Yankee Stadium on Aug. 15? Yep, a lie.