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Kagro in the Morning


Jun 24, 2021

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Previously on KITM:

You might have heard that Nancy Pelosi was to create a select committee to investigate the Jan. 6 insurrection upon the Capitol. Nancy wondered where you could have heard such a thing. Now we know where —  from Nancy Pelosi, today.

You’ve heard that Eric Adams is in the lead for the New York City Democratic Mayoral primary. Candidate Maya Wiley says she’s taking her ranked-choice #2 spot and is turning it into a #1. You might have heard Andrew Yang’s presidential team screwed the pooch, but they say it was the mayoral team.

And now David Waldman and Greg Dworkin with the latest:

Field trip! House Republicans get to dress like Great White Hunters with Donald Trump down by the border. If they find any Trump wall still standing they will pose in front of it. Peter Doocy asks Jen Psaki if Kamala Harris might have a secret crush on Donald.

John McAfee, founder of the McAfee antivirus software company was ”eccentric”... You know, the on a remote Belize island running a bio-lab, dozens of armed guards, neighbor turning up with a bullet hole in his headharems of under age prostitutes, admitted and suspected drugs and drug dealing sort of “eccentric”. The one thing John apparently wasn’t into was paying taxes. McAfee told friends “If I suicide myself, I didn’t. I was whackd” and, “Know that if I hang myself, a la Epstein, it will be no fault of mine.” Anyhow, yesterday, John was found… Well, he was found in Spain. 

The Saudi operatives who killed Jamal Khashoggi received paramilitary training in the U.S., which evidently did not include “making it look like a suicide”.

Edward Snodgrass simply tried to execute ”a dying man’s wishes”, which happened to be "voter fraud”. He might get the book thrown at him, including months in jail, unlike Crystal Mason, who was unaware that she couldn’t vote on parole, and got 5 years.

There’s no jail time for the first defendant to be sentenced in the Jan. 6 insurrection at the US Capitol, but there are a lot more to come.

Donald Trump downplayed COVID-19 while hundreds of thousands of Americans died, caught it (worrying Mark Meadows sick), leveraged the power of the presidency to get himself cured, then went back to mocking people who did get sick while hundreds of thousands more Americans died.

Idiot Matt Gaetz tried to showboat on critical race theory, but General Mark Milley, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, earned his title, and proved it with his answer to Gaetz, who probably still has his head cocked like a Labrador retriever, trying to understand it. This is not what Laura Ingraham paid Milley to do.

“Critical Race Theory” sounds like maybe you’re trying to criticize people’s racism, and there are many people out there who are proud of their racism and ready to fight you for it. David suggests that non-racists do nothing… but do nothing over at school board meetings, where taking up space can be good.

Progressive leaders and activists wonder if Joe Biden’s magic wand broke. Meanwhile, populist and fake-populist leaders in Eastern Europe are sad that no one likes them anymore. In the US, the Southern Baptist Convention had to elect new no-nothings when their old no-nothings learned too much.

Ivanka and Jared are privately appalled with the behavior of Donald Trump, or they’re just laying low until the estate sale.  

Okay, so maybe it wasn’t Italian satellites causing Donald to lose the election. Maybe it was chickens... No, those weren’t kernels of truth on the henhouse floor.