May 28, 2019
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Have a nice weekend? Three days for most of us, which is nice, including David Waldman and KITM. We lost Donald Trump for a few days, which is even nicer, at least for us.
It was Honest Abe Shinzō/Shinzō Abe’s turn to babysit Donald. They were almost buddies once they lost the ol’ balls and chains. There was golfing, natch, and a trophy presentation to a Sumo champion that wore a mawashi almost as big as the Presidential Depends. (Trump remembered the lifts, so he retained his height advantage.) Then, finally on to a celebration of the Allied defeat of the Axis nations aboard a Japanese military ship. Man, if only their buddy Jong-un could have been there to join in, to maybe throw a needle in there about Pearl Harbor or something, it would’ve been perfect.
Back at home, William Barr put the final touches on Trump’s public enemies list. Sarah Sanders can tell you this is so proper and the other side is so treasonous, that neither she nor you have to look into it at all. You and I agree, or else we would have forced Democrats into impeachment hearings by now.
Meanwhile, the IRS is being made into a partisan tool… why didn’t we think of that? Future Department Department of Homeland Security chief Ken Cuccinelli says that states can use their secret war powers to fight immigration, once Donald Trump uses his secret anti-constitutional powers to loosen up some things.
Stephen K.G. Bannon’s European revolution is still going strong, although his allies seem to be moving forward without him. That’s ok, he can lean on his day job, installing fencing near El Paso.
17 are injured, 2 dead in a mass stabbing near Tokyo. Mass assaults can be made much more efficient with the use of science.