Thu, 4 March 2021
The best thing about it being March 4th, finally, is that it will soon be March 5th. That, and David Waldman, Greg Dworkin, and today’s KITM:
Are the calculations correct? Is this the day Trump followers have been waiting for? The day is young, but it looks like the storm might need to wait a while longer. The US House did scrap its Thursday session, but not before passing H.R.1, the most important set of democracy reforms since the 1965 Voting Rights Act, and the George Floyd Justice in Policing Act. (The insurrectionists just wish they could’ve blowed that up good.)
Fear not wingnuts, for there is still the Senate. Who needs bombs when they have a filibuster? Democrats aren’t giving up these bills without a fight (maybe), and the filibuster could get busted in the process.
Polling looks to be on President Biden’s side half way through his first 100 days. Popular policies, however, do not make a popular president, or party. Republicans don’t need to make anything better in order to keep their jobs. For instance, Stockton, California’s basic income experiment was a great success, but the Mayor that introduced it wasn’t reelected.
Joe Biden was leading our country to a COVID-19-free future until "neanderthal thinking" in Texas and Mississippi threatened to return us back to the stone age. Troglodytes nonetheless might have a hard time overcoming the emergency standards established in forward-thinking OSHA requirements.
Wed, 3 March 2021
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin deliver us to the hump of a not-so-chaotic and informative week.
Meanwhile, Joe Biden bestows Americans with the gift of summer, by delivering enough vaccine for all of us by the end of spring! All he needs is some more good news and ‘22 and ‘24 are in the bag, right? Well, no, Democrats will need to be unanimous in passing legislation, because Republicans will be unanimous in blocking any, no matter how popular or essential it is, because they simply weren’t elected to govern, they were elected to win.
In lieu of having anything constructive to add, Republicans attack the free market decisions of the Walt Disney Company, Hasbro and Dr. Seuss Enterprises LP, and struggle with the prefered personal pronouns of tubers... although they used to be be just fine with a little makeup and a moustache performing a gender change for years.
The generic Washington Football Team loses their cheerleaders, which is too bad, because what’s more generic than the cheer, “Goooo…. ‘Team’!” ? There’s still plenty of teams vying for “Racist Football Team.”
Joe Manchin will never, ever leave the filibuster, and Democrats can’t leave Joe Manchin, but perhaps something can be worked out to make them both more pleasant. Are you confused about the function and importance of the Parliamentarian of the United States Senate, and when it is appropriate and prudent to ignore her, and what the procedure, processes, and precedent is in bypassing her? Listen to David’s analysis on KITM’s final hour and learn how much, much more you can be confused about!
Tue, 2 March 2021
David Waldman and Joan McCarter deliver Tuesday’s KITM as well as you’d expect. (As long as you expect perfection.)
Governor Andrew Cuomo did remember to ask for consent before his third accused sexual harassment, but Cuomo probably should brush up on every other conceivable aspect of human interaction, perhaps on his own time. Lindsey Graham advocates for the Republican model.
Liberal Thinking is always welcome on KITM, especially when personified by the blogger of that name (and also the name of Rich). Rich returns with his series of ideas on enhancing the American Rescue Plan, today concentrating on getting the most out of budget reconciliation procedures to ensure the welfare of Americans.
Filibusters are generally pretty bad. Even the original meaning of the word referred to nothing anyone should get mixed up in. Blue slips, although really blue, have increasingly become useful only for Gop obstruction.
The COVID-19 relief that communities of color are desperate for is on its way, minus Republican support. The bill is still in the Senate, with the lives of many hanging in the balance. Also hanging by a thread, the remains of the Voting Rights Act, and the voting rights of minority voters.
In Idaho, the Committee to Protect and Preserve the Idaho Constitution battle lawyers paid by the Idaho Constitutional Defense Fund.
Mon, 1 March 2021
Remember last March? Okay, forget last March. David Waldman and Greg Dworkin introduce us to a much better one today:
Trump-who? at CPAC-what now? CPAC used to be the event Republican losers, looneys and nuts would gather at to say crazy stupid stuff. It still is, of course, but anymore that’s pretty much who they all are, and what they all say every day, and that just ruins everything. (No matter how much they rune everything.) So, A loser said loser things at a loser event. Even at CPAC, Donald couldn’t pull past 55% Don Jr. couldn’t make double digits even if Dad doesn’t run. None of them could win in the real world, therefore the real world has become their enemy. (France takes their corrupt, disgraced president and locks him up.)
Meanwhile, in the real world, Democrats need to get things done. The Senate continues to work on the COVID-19 relief bill. The $15 wage hike was abandoned, almost rescued, and deserted again. It ain’t over yet, maybe. Daily Kos, andKITM contributor, Liberal Thinking, whom you may call “Rich”, has many ideas and suggestions on how to enhance the American rescue plan. You can read Rich’s proposals, discuss them at the All Daily Kos Progressives community group, and now hear them as a series of short topics, starting with today’s show!
You might know Bill Harnsberger from his morning promos for Kagro in the Morning, or his contributions to local squirrel culture, but you really should know him for the Cheers & Jeers blog, which he has put together for over 17 years! It’s fundraising time for Bill, and fundsending time for you.
Fri, 26 February 2021
David Waldman was away for two days, but nobody could take him being gone for six, so here he is for a Friday KITM! Greg Dworkin couldn’t pass up this chance to sail his Raft o’ Stories™ back into port either.
CPAC will never be confused with CPAP. The future of conservatism is white supremacy, bigotry, conspiracy theories, fanaticism, and Marjorie Taylor Greene. Trump is putting together a super PAC to challenge anyone who has defied him. You’d think Trump and his allies would have been defeated, humiliated, and betrayed enough by now. CPAC’s Last Chairman is staying away from this year’s CPAC.
Don’t expect a Gop civil war however, when Republicans are still happily arranging a real one. Mitch McConnell will tell you that comparing Trump 2024 with any other Trump would be just impractical. Absentee voting led to higher turnout but had no effect on the outcome of 2020 election. It took historic levels of Dem turnout to beat Trump then, so the rush is on to set up enough gerrymandering and voter suppression to insure Trump 2024. Of course Joe Biden will also be running for re-election, and hopefully will attend to democracy in the meantime.
It was only a year ago, when Donald Trump told you that COVID-19 was going to go away, but did you believe him? Well, it is beginning to look better, in that only tens of thousands are being infected each day. 50 million vaccines have been administered. More hope to get their vaccination soon — except Republicans, natch. Nursing home infections and deaths are dropping, so maybe grandma is safe.
The Senate parliamentarian advised against including a $15 minimum wage in the upcoming COVID-19 bill, and of course Democrats took her advice. Well, maybe not all of them, but Joe Manchin and Krysten Sinema did, and after all, they do run the place. As usual, Democrats are clock-watchers around quitting time. Marjorie Taylor Green is set to take over there as well. David applauds Steny Hoyer’s and Sherrod Brown’s trolling by process.
Also in crime: It seems Ted Cruz might have funneled political donations into his own pocket. Ted is practicing a catchy slogan for when he goes behind bars. If Donald Trump is to ever go to jail, a lot of people will need to go to jail first. MSB might be hanging around Mar-a-Lago for a while. A guy, who might be an actual lawyer in Texas, wants Joe Biden to become the proxy president for Donald Trump… in order to preserve democracy. How many crazy lawyers can there be, anyhow?
Thu, 25 February 2021
Another debate tonight! There can’t be many more of those, at least for a few of them up there. And then there’s Super Tuesday, or one of them, because aren’t all Tuesdays a little super with KITM and David Waldman?
Richard Walters started at the RNC at 23 years old and in just 7 years is well on his way to millions through double, and even triple dipping. What’s not to love with this guy?
How does Ivanka Trump do.. No wait, she doesn’t do anything.
Donald Trump, the black swan president, meets his black swan threat with Coronavirus-19, and finds his usual dosage of lies non-efficacious. International Olympic Committee member, Dick Pound, isn’t just going to stand around and… “twiddle his thumbs”... waiting for action.
Roger Stone tried to force Judge Amy Berman Jackson to recuse herself because she praised the jurors for serving with "integrity”. Trump wants the two female Supreme Court justices to recuse themselves because… well, he’s still working on that rationale. Hang on, Ginni Thomas is volunteering to sub in for them.
Wed, 24 February 2021
What were we doing a year ago, today? Well, we recorded it for you. And today, we'll answer that question, by... playing you that recording.
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin welcomed us to another episode of NKN, Nobody Knows Nothing™. Of course, those two know some things, but check out all that people don’t know:
So, let’s talk about Bernie Sanders. Bernie could be the nominee, and our unity candidate. And, unity is certainly something we can use. But, he could lose! He could make Jewish voters flee to Canada! He could make Never Trumpers not Never anymore! It could be worse than 2016, in fact it could be 2008 all over again! This is all great news for John McCain. Then again, nobody knows nothing.
The good news is that the ignorance in this country dropped by half once Air Force One lifted off the tarmac to India. Meanwhile, back in the States, Trump’s hit list is still being compiled, a tough job considering that even folks like Richard Grenell weren’t goose stepping that high just a couple of years ago.
Tue, 23 February 2021
David Waldman and Joan McCarter! They probably talk all the time, but if you can hear it, it must be Tuesday on KITM:
Merrick Garland is doing very well in his confirmation hearings, which most of us could have guessed for half a decade now. Mr. Garland humiliated Josh Hawley by citing the horror of 1/6, but really, how many Republicans couldn’t you shame by citing the horror of 1/6? The answer is, of course, all of them, because shame is just not a thing they feel.
Throw all the shame and humiliation you want at Ted Cruz, for example. He won’t feel a thing. Ted has made a career out of being the clown above the septic tank dunking booth for years now, still climbing back into his seat and begging for more. It turns out, the money’s pretty good — so good that the FEC might want to hear a bit more.
CPAC is the place to be for “Ted Cruz”es that hope to be “Donald Trump”s. Marjorie Taylor Greene wants to make “Standing” the next “Cancel/PC/Fake News” Republican nonsense-scare word, but let’s face it, she’s no Boebert when it comes to political savvy.
Ostensible Democrat Joe Manchin (Contrarian, WV) likes to throw wrenches, with particularly good aim at women of color. Manchin has a problem with a $15 minimum wage, so now it’s everyone’s problem. COVID-19 relief is moving ahead however, but Democrats need to make certain that the next round of assistance gets to everyone who needs it.
Donald Trump is guilty of pandemicide. He could have committed even more ‘cides if he put his mind to it. Many in Washington on 1/6 were ready to help. Ron Johnson didn’t see an armed insurrection, and with the exception of the bats, sticks, crossbows, guns, and bombs, he might have been correct. The Oath Keepers played a key role at the insurrection and might have had friends on the inside. One of their leaders said she was in the Capitol by invitation. Jessica Watkins is transgender, so you know at least that there are some inclusive white supremacist organizations available.
Mon, 22 February 2021
America’s largest gathering of the biggest idiots is the Conservative Political Action Conference, or “CPAC”. Donald Trump is CPAC, and will attempt to become “the GOP” there, on his way to return to the presidency the following week. Who will stop him? There is no room for anti-Trumpers in the Republican party. There is no room for somewhat-Trumpers in the Republican party. Most Republicans don’t even want themselves in the Republican party. There certainly is no room for reality left in the Trump party, which poses quandaries for fact-based journalists.
It will be a bonanza for lawsuits, though. The Supreme Court declined to halt the turnover of Donald Trump’s tax records to New York state prosecutors. Trump will never turn them over, no matter how many of his chumps and lackeys go to prison. Ted Cruz, on the other hand, can’t even buy a friend right now. Texans hate how much they like AOC, presently, because of Ted. Ron Desantis can’t pay off his supporters with vaccines either. Compared with those guys, Trump gets away with murder.
On January 6, what did Nancy Pelosi know, and when did she know it? The same as Mitch McConnell, it turns out. An Oath Keeper leader that broke into the Capitol wonders if maybe Antifa secretly sent her there.
Fri, 19 February 2021
David Waldman warms us up for the weekend:
Ted Cruz is not Donald Trump. Cruz isn’t even Joe Quimby. Ted just assumed someone would clean up the mess at home while he was gone, but Cruz somehow couldn’t guess it would follow him right onto the airplane. (He named his poodle Snowflake — take that, snowflakes!) Not quite tan and rested, Cruz quickly returned from Cancun still treading water, while people kept throwing him anchors. AOC raised $1 million for the people of Texas while he was gone.
Idaho Representative Russ Fulcher sure wasn’t letting anyone, or anything, slow him down on his way to a vote, least of which some female officer and her metal detector. Now it’s up to the towering intellects of Washington, Louie Gohmert and Lauren Boebert, to reason with authorities.
Nearly 5,000 National Guard troops will stay in DC to protect against the second prophesied Trumpist insurrection on March 4… Maga’s are probably dumb enough to try, too. The Capitol Police has suspended six officers and has another 35 under investigation in connection with the 1/6 riot. The real errors, and probable crimes, weren’t being made by those on the ground though, as perhaps by the those making decisions above them.
The mainstream media loves horse races. Don’t let them undersell the efficacy or oversell the risks of vaccines to sell you clicks. The vaccine is better than expected, or at least reported. Things are getting better, and more help is on the way.
Thu, 18 February 2021
Why not kick back today with David Waldman and Greg Dworkin, relax and take the time to learn the latest — There’s no Rush!
The late ethno-nationalistic sadist Rush Limbaugh was about 30 years later than I would have preferred, but he finally shut up. Also heading to warmer climes — Rafael ‘Ted’ Cruz has been caught snowbirding down to Cancun, Mexico for a long weekend. There wasn’t much for Ted to not do back home, that he already hadn’t done before. Cruz can’t help that Texas wind turbines seem to stop when United’s jet turbines run just fine. It is nice however, that he wore a mask this time. Unfortunately, unlike Rush, Ted is expected to return.
Perhaps folks should wait at the airport to welcome back the Senator, as it looks like they might have the power on over there. Everywhere else seems totally F’d. (Here’s where non-Texans can help un-mess Texas.) Texans can vote for Beto O’Rourke next time.
Mitch McConnell and Donald Trump’s forces are pretty evenly matched, assuring mutual destruction, and giving Democrats some breathing room to good things, such as an immigration bill with 8-year pathway to citizenship. Promotions can finally come to female generals without Donald tweeting they weren’t hot enough to qualify.
Few details separate Qanon from the John Birch Society. Conspiratorial, bigoted nut-jobs have always been the conservative foundation. Republicans mold reality like clay. 1/6 Capitol insurrectionist Daniel Egtvedt, fought with police, was kicked out, returned, fought/injured police again, left, returned, fought with police again, and of course… was blue lives matter. The Gop found the riot’s real villain: Nancy Pelosi.
Wed, 17 February 2021
David Waldman and guest Greg Dworkin accompany us on today’s leg of our trip:
The blackout continues as Texas is surprised by weather too cold for their infrastructure, tax avoidance, ideology, self-image, and sanity. Governor Greg Abbott wonders why AOC would have done this to him. James Inhofe hasn’t weighed in. Wind turbines would have helped, if there were more of them. At least it’s too cold to not wear a mask.
IDing rioters has become a fun and helpful project for the conscientious internet. Some make it easy, like the girl's basketball coach from Hershey Christian Academy, Zeeker Bozell, soon researched to be Brent Bozell IV, an element of lawlessness doing tremendous damage to everyone else, just like his daddy, his granddaddy, his great-granddaddy, and his great-great granddaddy. Must run in the genes.
1/6 will get a 9/11-style commission that will probably focus on Kevin McCarthy, and we have Jaime Herrera Beutler and House Democrats decision to depose her to thank for that. Speaking truth to power will endanger her career as well as her life, but you know, her Republican co-workers are fine with that. The Louisiana Gop wouldn’t censure David Duke, but it did censure Bill Cassidy. Donald Trump always likes people that like him, and says Mitch McConnell is an ugly loser.
Tue, 16 February 2021
David Waldman welcomes you to today’s post-holiday KITM special! How was your Presidents Day, George Washington’s second birthday, the Ides of February (following the Nones, before the Pridie to the Kalend, et cētera)? You learn a lot on this show!
For instance, do you know who’s responsible for the “Reid Rule”? You would, if you’ve been paying attention in class... Joan McCarter reminds us that the filibuster is the enemy of democracy. Krysten Sinema and Joe Manchin believe the filibuster is their friend, but it just makes them Republican tools voting against popular and needed legislation. Reconciliation probably won’t hurt Democrats unless Republicans really want it to.
More than four million people are still without power in Texas. If only they could just harness the energy of Republican blame shifting, they’d be ok. With Donald Trump, blame shifters have a lot of heavy lifting ahead of them. They’ve stayed in shape, though. They are doing to Nancy Pelosi what they plan to do to Kamala Harris, and what they did for years with Hillary Clinton. David remembers the first time they pulled their “what did Pelosi know and when did she know it?” shtick with the Bush-Cheney torture “debate”. Unfortunately, the aughts are a long-lost time, back when the internet was horse-drawn, folks watched a thing called Adobe Flash Player, and Glenn Greenwald hadn’t yet descended into madness.
Mon, 15 February 2021
Happy Presidents Day! Wow, Donald Trump has ruined another thing forever, huh? How about, “Happy Family Day”? Or, “Happy Canadian Flag Day”? Canadians always have it figured out. David Waldman and Greg Dworkin never fear the Ides of February:
Our long national nightmare is over, again. Yes, the majority of Americans wanted Trump convicted, but since when do the majority get what they want? The Republicans that acquitted Trump voted to save their paychecks, but more importantly (for them), they probably saved their own lives. Republicans figured that they can always hide from rioters, but one wrong vote can earn them a sniper. They could say anything and it would be easier to recover from than a bullet hole.
Contrary to appearances, Democrats did not chicken out on calling witnesses. David describes the inside-process reasoning behind the deal to get the Herrera Beutler story on the record. The Senate trial was also a success in providing valuable evidence for upcoming probable prosecutions. It is also provided the closest thing we’ll ever see to bipartisanship as long as there is still a filibuster.
Anyhow, Republicans are always ready to practice what they preach against. For instance, Conservatives haunt a Q fever-dream of deviancy, slithering through hideous crimes on down to even more hideous crimes, (with some extra kinkiness) so they have the dungeon locked up. Conservative Christian/accused cuckoldress/Trump placeholder, Marjorie Taylor Greene, is only their latest “Aristocrats!” punchline.
Fri, 12 February 2021
There’s still an impeachment trial on, and if you think I’m going to be able to keep Armando off the air, you ought to be impeached!
We started right off the bat with everybody’s big worry, that the decision to truncate the impeachment process might be a mistake. (Not that anybody’s looking for a miracle, here.) That set things up for Armando’s critique not only of the strategy, but of the performances of some of the House Managers. But those criticisms don’t even approach the complete panning Trump’s lawyers got—and deserved—from trial observers, including Republican Senators!
Still unanswered questions heading into today’s proceedings: Why no indication of any response to the violence at the White House that day? Can the Republican Party ever be de-Trumpified, given that everyone it has nominated for national office in the past 8 years who isn’t Trump has been marked for death by Republican voters? And how close did rioters really get to Pence, and was there ever a “nuclear football” in play?
On a (slightly) different note, it turns out that Trump’s most depraved lies are even worse than we knew. He was much more seriously ill from COVID than the White House ever let on (to no one’s true surprise). But also, after having held himself out as an example of the “miracle” of Regeneron (and promising it, for free, to Americans in need), not only did he wander off into the sunset without delivering, it also turns out his case was actually a failed trial for the drug!
Thu, 11 February 2021
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin give us a quick, 2 hour review of Trump impeachment II, Day 2:
History will demand to know why we didn’t hang Donald Trump. History will discover that it’s because Republicans acquitted him. Trump is as guilty as sin, but so is the Gop, and they know that if they don’t hang together, they will hang separately. But then again, if they hang together… they might hang together, so just maybe they should get, while the getting’s good…
Trump knew Mike Pence was in danger on 1/6, but once Donald found out that Mike was getting away, he sicced his dogs harder. Today we will discover new horrors Republicans will ignore while they doodle new process gibberish to fall back on. Meanwhile, Democrats keep the process of governing flowing. The Senate has norms, the House has rules, and so far it’s not a complete disaster.
Perhaps Democrats don’t dare to think big enough to capture Republican’s attention. For example, David Hogg, Parkland shooting survivor and gun control activist, is making a pillow. Ali Alexander, one of the insurrectionist founders of the “Stop the Steal” conspiracy lie that culminated in 1/6, is making a 10 million occupant MAGA city, so that people embarrassed by their Trump support can banish anyone that disagrees with them in any way. If that goes wrong, there will also be a 10 million vacancy “back up” city in South America… which actually ends up not being all that unique of an idea.
Hey, remember the last impeachment? The Ukraine government sure does, and spurs memories with the release of transcripts of Rudy Giuliani’s attempt to intimidate them. Ukraine officials will be happy to assist in any US investigations, now that they aren’t being blocked from doing so. After the present impeachment, Georgia prosecutors will be getting in line to take a whack at Donald.
Wed, 10 February 2021
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin (almost) have all the kinks worked out on KITM podcast/broadcast! (Once our tech guys figure out how to remove the kitten filter on David we’ll be all set for video.)
It looks as if the Presidential Apprentice will close out with their worst ever contestants. Republican Senator Bill Cassidy ended up hitting the gong last night. The future impeached Mayor of Mar-a-Lago is reportedly quite displeased with the defense team he will never pay. By the way, last night it was decided, once and for all, (STFU, Turley) that it is constitutional to try a former president. As Bruce Castor, Rosa Brooks, and Ice Cube can tell you, you also can arrest the president. Just about any of Trump’s lawyers will, and probably already have, told you: Trump is a f—ing crook.
Everybody knows Donald Trump is a crook — Everybody. Every Trump follower knows Trump is lying to everyone, they only vary in the degree that they believe they are in on the con. Michigan state Senate Leader Mike Shirkey believes he’s a charter member of the hoax. Most Gop Senators aren’t that deluded, and divvy up their morality based on their mortgage payments. What do you want them to do, miss a car payment for democracy? If so, you are dumber than the cannon fodder they sent to the Capitol on 1/6. Some of those people are finding out not everyone was in on the joke. Some will always be the punchline.
The insurrectionist attack on on 1/6 was not spontaneous. It has been traced through Donald Trump’s political career. It can be traced back to the losers of the Civil War, and the churches that keep sending them into battle. Dead-enders don’t believe their cause is lost, it’s just that they didn’t bring enough guns the last time.
Tue, 9 February 2021
So many crises! Not so much chaos. Somehow, it all feels more tackleable now. David Waldman rolls up our aggregated sleeves:
House impeachment managers, Senate leadership, and even Donald Trump’s legal team have agreed on the impeachment trial rules, so here we go again! The question is, can Donald stand trial? The answer is yes.
Republicans argue this business will be a slippery slope, eventually leading to the impeachment of cats and ponies. Many scholars, such as Armando, don’t believe this is what the Framers intended, pointing to all of the colonial buzz around Warren Hastings’ impeachment, and Founding Father son John Quincy Adams’ letters and commentary. Therefore, no dead president need worry about being impeached, unless resuscitated, and even then, Nixon’s clear.
Democrats could wait until March 4, when Donald Trump is president again, to impeach him at that time, but really, even though the dude’s got a lot of impeachments left in him, Dems do plan to make this one, the one to remember. On the other hand, Republicans plan to take hostages if provoked, including the president, vice president and… Maxine Waters! and, Cory Booker! If really pushed, they might even call Marjorie Taylor Greene to the stand.
You got to hope the DC guard will have a quiet time these next few days, and that they continue to be monitored and vetted. Meanwhile, governing continues, somehow. Joan McCarter joins KITM in the last half hour to let us know how that’s going. Democrats are negotiating with Senator Joe Manchin, also a Democrat, on limiting the direct payments of $1,400. The House isn’t letting this slow them down, when so many, especially themselves, will gain. The House is wisely upping the ante with a $3,000 child cash benefit. Remember, the House could change with only a few votes.
Stormy Daniels says Trump offered her a role on The Apprentice in exchange for sex. That woman’s been through a lot. The US Justice Department dropped its Trump-era lawsuit against Melania’s enemy, Stephanie Wolkoff.
Mon, 8 February 2021
David Waldman, Greg Dworkin and Armando are here with last night’s game highlights, followed by 2 hours of political news and opinions:
Did you catch that commercial with the old guy driving out in the winter with no roof, no hat, telling us that the place to find national unity is in the center of Kansas under a big white cross? They’ll try to sell us anything, I guess.
Remember Lou Dobbs? Why bother? Lou’s been gone only days but it already feels like years. Like many, Dobbs too felt the icy touch of Donald Trump. Marjorie Q Greene had her 15 minutes of exposure, also. She can still spread disease and advocate killing, but just not the way she used to. Marge’s owning the libs shtick is old, now she is left owning only herself. (AOC shouldn’t be even in the same paragraph as Greene.) Now, Lauren Boebert, she deserves to be exposed/forgotten. Boebert came to office with eight liens for nonpayment of unemployment insurance, and hoped to put the bills on her federal expense account.
Last Friday, when we were going over the four roll call votes on stripping Marjorie Taylor Greene of her committee assignments, David noted that U.S. Rep. Ron Wright wasn't present to vote, and for some reason had not taken advantage of the remote voting rules to do so. I guess we now know why. Like Herman Cain, being dead doesn’t mean Ron doesn’t have something to say.
Donald Trump could’ve been the president of Parler if he only arted his deal when he was an office holder. Unfortunately, Trump has earned a lot more exposure before everyone can start ignoring him. Some more exposure, a few convictions, then we can toss him on the ash heap of celebrity history.
Chuck Schumer would prefer exposure over justice for Trump, therefore even though Chuck was big on witnesses, he isn’t anymore. Also the trial won’t be held in committee, both of which Armando can and will tell you are mistakes. Impeachment trials have been held in committees, former federal officials can be impeached, and removal from office is literally the least they could do to Trump. There are rules and procedures and guidelines and precedents in place supporting all of this. There is also a lot of key evidence that will be lost without the proper handling.
Improper handling is a Trump lawyer specialty. Donald’s new lawyer, Bruce Castor, has a soft spot for bottom feeder celebrities, likes TV cameras, and wants political power, so expect a lot of “political theater” to come.
Fri, 5 February 2021
Here it is, Friday, and David Waldman is still declining to host KITM Weekend. That just means that we’ll need to pack more into today. You, however, do have the next couple days to absorb it all:
Republicans tried Liz Cheney for heresy, and Liz almost got her pyre lit. There is only room for one deity in this party, and Marjorie Taylor Green not only is the vessel for Trump’s love, Marj is Trump, manifest. (Until the Donald’s return.) Liz knows who to kneel to, now. Meanwhile, new scriptures will always need new interpretation.
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez revealed the emotions of those inside the Capitol during the January 6 attacks. Nancy Mace revealed who she is. AOC supporters reveal their cute pets. As usual, Daniel Dale checks the facts.
House Republicans took four votes to show that they’re all in with QAnon now. David details the reasons and reasoning behind roll calls 22, 23, 24, and 25, including the Previous Question, the Five Minute Rule, what’s wrong with the Senate, and why it’s Aaron Burr’s fault.
It’s definitely not Canada’s fault, although even the US Senate has a Parliamentarian, and she will be a big part of the reconciliation process, most importantly the part where the Senate passes a $15 minimum wage. Joe Biden’s covid-relief plan is already a success with voters across the board. Keep up the good work, Joe!
Tracking devices weren’t Capitol rioters vaccines, they were right in their pants the whole time. A huge number of lunatics went directly from Donald Trump’s incendiary speech right into the Capitol. Not all of them, of course — did you see the lines to get in? Those same phones are tracking the FBI right back to them, all over the country. And, if needed, their phones can lead right to their bank accounts.
Thu, 4 February 2021
On KITM’s Thursday mind-jazz jam, David Waldman and Greg Dworkin break it down with some improv, yet oh so smooth:
Republicans embraced chaos with Donald Trump. Trump’s gone, but the they just can’t quit the chaos. It could have been Liz Cheney or Marjorie Taylor Greene, but that ended up being two decisions too many for Kevin McCarthy, who would rather you thought he was the biggest idiot ever as House minority leader, than for anyone to actually expect him to be House minority leader. MT Greene was the face of the John Birch society on Facebook, and has become their representative in Congress, as Birchers have taken many forms over the years, but in reality have never left. Marj just arrived, but already is taking command of her own mini party, including a few ready to take one for the team.
It would be nice if Marj and the gang could just feed on themselves and not involve the rest of the world, but no such luck. You know when paramilitary groups call themselves “Martyrs”, they have some big plans. There is still time for Republicans to do the right thing, but who expects that? It is up to the last democratic party in control, the Democratic party, to fix things, and President Joe Biden to unify America.
Joe can do it. President Biden has "an open door and an open mind", and all the cards. He has the support of a grateful nation. Republicans only have obstruction, but Democrats have reconciliation and soon their amendment tree will be too full to tamper with, as everyone knows, amendments of an amendment to an amendment are not allowed because it would be too complicated.
Joe Biden can deliver USPS from Donald Trump, by firing Louis DeJoy for starters. Trump aides noticed their boss wasn’t around and requested extensions on their benefits. They might be waiting a while for those checks.
Lauren Boebert hates the “lefts” so much, that when she misses a turn she has to drive around the world to her destinations.
Meanwhile, whatever legal or constitutional test you apply, Donald Trump is guilty of inciting violence. He can tell you that himself. Donald also has a chance to explain how he fought to stop the steal, while pocketing over 100 million dollars.
Wed, 3 February 2021
Okay, campers, rise and shine, and don't forget your booties 'cause it's cooooold out there today! Oh wait, it’s not Groundhog Day anymore? Well, there’s still something to be said for reliability. David Waldman delivers exactly the KITM we expect, right when we need it:
Greg Dworkin is on, and he has some questions. What’s taking so long on the coronavirus relief package? What about the vote-a-rama, concurrent resolutions and the rest of the arcane-a-procedurama coming up? The Dems finally got the gavels they earned, but Republicans neither understand nor care about governing, so how will that affect things? Two-thirds of Americans are sidin’ with Biden on COVID relief, and the other third will wish they did.
Donald Trump misses his Diet Coke button, but he misses his Twitter button more. No one will miss Donald Trump. Republicans remain the party of Trump for the moment, but why stick with Donald, when Marjorie Taylor Green is so much Trumpier? Kevin McCarthy hopes to move Marge out of governing and into a more Twitter-centered position. 7,600 Utah Republicans have switched their party registrations to anything else.
The Capitol rioters weren’t your regular radicals, they were Trump schmucks, so if it wasn’t for their ubiquitous social media presence they might have been hard to track. Donald Trump’s impeachment defense is half-baked and idiotic, but you get what you pay for.
Tue, 2 February 2021
After dispensing with the formalities of Groundhog Day references, it was time to take note of today’s social media buzz around AOC’s description of her experiences during the Jan. 6 insurrection. Speaking of the insurrection, Marjorie Taylor Greene’s days on her assigned committees are numbered, and the number remaining shall be three.
We’re a week out from the substantive start of Trump’s second impeachment trial, and there’s still some concern over how the new majority will want to handle it, though we don’t know why, because the answer is obvious. Equally confusing, though, are the Republican counter-strategies. (If that is indeed what they are.) Trump’s insistence on arguing flatly that he won the election, though, is at odds with… well, everything. Not to mention how extraordinarily uncomfortable it should make even the most shameless Republicans.
And speaking of being at odds with everything, we’re now learning that the Wisconsin “pharmacist” who sabotaged 500 doses of COVID vaccine is also a flat-earther, and probably just inches away from believing in Jewish Space Lasers.
Joan McCarter caps off the day with her take on the (almost normal-ish) Capitol Hill scene. Reconciliation is rolling along, clearing a path for sweeping aside Republican deficit peacock posturing, and clearing the path to Doing Big Things.
Mon, 1 February 2021
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin take us into the first February of the Biden administration, and it feels pretty good. Don’t worry, they will still be thagomizing Donald Trump when necessary.
About 20 million coronavirus vaccine doses have evaporated, and would be nice to have around now. It could be theft, lunacy, fraud, or just bad bookkeeping. More vaccines are being introduced, and more is better. Of course, efficacy, and your results, might vary. Keep safe and mask correctly.
Joe Biden has the opportunity to do the most for the nation as president, by continuing to do the most for the nation. Slowing down or playing it safe will be appreciated by no one, except for those who don’t have the nation’s wellbeing as a priority. Republicans are offering bipartisanship, unity, and bubkes. They’ll offer more or less the same in a meeting with the President this afternoon, unless more rational voices — like from West Virginia — can be heard.
Being held accountable is not “cancel culture”. Marjorie Taylor Greene might be the worst enemy for the causes that she supports, but for now, she’s doing pretty well for Marjorie Taylor Greene. It is difficult to expect Greene to be sane when her career has depended on being insane, or to tell the truth when her future career depends on the big lie. Republicans could have chosen a better path, but instead pay tribute to The Donald, and his scam in exile as the Antipope of Mar-a-Lago.
Trump’s lawyers bail out, knowing the upcoming impeachment trial will neither look good on their resumes, nor pay them a dime. What have we learned so far from Donald Trump’s campaign to subvert the election? Plenty, as Donald’s been subverting the 2020 election since he subverted the 2016 election. New stuff will be coming out, including the stuff that is old stuff for KITM listeners, and probably keep coming out for generations to come.
Fri, 29 January 2021
David Waldman, and the Biden administration, deliver us to another potentially quiet weekend. We can get finally get some work done here around the Headquarters, like finding out why the circuit breaker keeps tripping whenever the microwave and the space laser are used at the same time. Annoying!
Marjorie Taylor Greene is so Q-wazy! Unfortunately for everyone, Greene is not only extremely offensive, but also quite dangerous. Unfortunately for the Gop, Marjorie’s bad for business, too. Republicans ignored their early fears about Marjorie Taylor Greene, as there’s always been a little Marjorie Taylor Greene in all of them. They expected Democrats to be so genteel as to not bring attention to such foibles. Not this time, this time is is serious, it is personal and it is war. Sadly, some aren’t aware of that yet.
Mark Meadows has returned from his Mar-a-Lago job interview and will need to talk to Marjorie Taylor Greene… about something, maybe the weather. Mark might need to ask Madison Cawthorn about where his money went.
Eli Zupnick wants to fix our senate, and on today’s KITM describes the Fix Our Senate campaign’s highest priority as the elimination of the legislative filibuster. Not all Democrats agree. For instance, Joe Lieberman wants to keep it, Elizabeth Warren does not...
Thu, 28 January 2021
You can’t sell David Waldman and Greg Dworkin short — KITM’s value only increases — and at such a bargain!
It’s quite simple, really. A populist uprising was born when the perfectly useless psychopaths on Reddit were turned into a successful executives, as it occurred to them that the best way you hurt “rich people” is by turning them into “poor people”... One minute hedge fund traders were up half a million in GameStop and the next, boom, their kids don't go to college and they've repossessed their Bentley. Nice, huh? Of course, nothing you have ever experienced will prepare you for the absolute carnage you are about to witness… to a more deserving bunch of clowns who might just discover a Gremlin or two in their perfect system.
GOP Congresswoman/crackpot/wingnut/nutjob/Q-anonymous/white supremacist/wannabe assassin/nitwit Marjorie Taylor Greene is also a rising star freshman Republican now assigned to the House Education and Labor Committee. It’s not like they didn’t know about her before she started. Kevin McCarthy is going to give Marjorie a good talking to, once Donald Trump tells him what he should say. Democrats have some ideas on what can and should be done, you know, for the sake of unity...
Unfortunately, Republicans idea of “unity” is more like “shared complicity”. The death toll of January 6 continues to rise. The violence was clearly incited that day, but it was also planned in advance. Tommy the Tuberville posed for pictures at the exact place and time he denied being, in order to meet with the entire gang of Trump infamy the night before the riots. Perhaps, someday, we can find out if they can all go to jail for stuff like that.
Wed, 27 January 2021
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin celebrate our second Thursday of normality with an typically extraordinary KITM:
William W. Belknap wasn’t impeached unconstitutionally, and neither will Donald J. Trump. But, with their livelihoods and lives on the line, don’t expect Republicans to be making any moral decisions soon, especially when it comes to their Trump base. Mitch McConnell says he took it easy on Democrats too long, now it’s no more Mr. Nice Guy.
The Senator with the kindercare name, Tommy Tuberville, suggested postponing President Joe Biden’s presidency on January 20. Rudy Giuliani suggested that Tommy slow down the electoral vote count on January 6. What do you think Tuberville talked about with Donald Trump and the director of the Republican Attorneys General Association on January 5? National chairman of the Agriculture and Rural Advisory Committee, Charles Herbster, was also at the meeting, and at the Rally-Riots the following day. Donald Trump invited everyone to walk with him down Pennsylvania Avenue, but somehow ended up kicking back at the White House without a care in the world, except to kill Mike Pence.
Dr. Anthony Fauci is still here, Donald Trump is not, that’s good news for everyone’s health. The U.S. needs to ramp up vaccinations to reach herd immunity. Joe Biden is on it. Of course Anti-vaccine activists are out there saying that Covid-19 shots are deadly. Meanwhile, Oklahoma will try to return the hydroxychloroquine they purchased for $2 million in CVS gift cards. Out of an abundance of caution, Senator Pat Leahy was taken to a hospital for observation yesterday. With an abundance of relief, Senator Leahy was found back at work today.
Tue, 26 January 2021
David Waldman delivers the Tuesday KITM, fresh and relaxed from a recent visit to the warm Aristotelian paradise of Twitter.com. Relatively so — now that we’ve said Bye, Don and goodnight Mr. Pillow to finally break off our abusive relationships with the bad, to build relationships with just the good forever, ever, ever.
Maybe not. After his 4 years of scamming the federal government went… surprisingly well, actually… branding genius Donald Trump christened his latest imaginary president-in-exile scam the "Office of the Former President" (Well, he couldn’t call it the Trump Foundation, could he?) Instead of steaks, Donald will be selling poison, also an unsettling marketing triumph for him. On January 6, Trump shot, and missed, both the Vice President and Speaker of the House. His business model will demand that he shoot again. The Republican business model demands that they defend Donald Trump to the death… perhaps not their death, however.
Impeachment manager Eric Swalwell could call Republicans as Senate trial witnesses since after all, they are witnesses, victims, and maybe a bit more. Armando’s on today, to enumerate the many reasons why the impeachment trial should be tried in committee. Patrick Leahy, as Senate President Pro Tempore, will follow historical precedent to preside over the Senate impeachment trials of a non-president.
Joan McCarter calls in the last half hour to describe how Mitch McConnell is playing the beltway press again on the filibuster. Mitch is an old hand at this. Chuck Schumer won the committee power sharing battle, and soon will need to win the filibuster battle. Chuck does plan to win again. Democrats are taking control in helping Americans, and Joe Biden supports budget reconciliation to help them get things done.
Mon, 25 January 2021
Ahhh! That’s what a weekend is supposed to be about: Nothing. Some breaking news — The First Dogs arrived at the White House, signalling a long-awaited pivot and change of tone, but it wasn’t the day Joe Biden finally became president. (That was last Wednesday). The media discovered Doug Emhoff’s last name, but will prefer to call him “The Second Gentleman” from now on. (“Second Banana” is inappropriate and right out.)
What will David Waldman and Greg Dworkin find to talk about?
It turns out, with Donald Trump sort of gone, there are still plenty of self-serving lying jerkwads in the ranks, ready to step up. Looneys, too. Democrats had a plan in case democracy fell, but seditionists are still in the Capitol, just presently hiding in sleeper cells. Well, not exactly sleeping, as state Republican parties vie for Qanon love. Arizona and Fox News root out the rational in their midst.
House Minority Leader Kevin McCarthy hopes to “strike a balance” between the self-serving and insane members of his caucus, blaming society for the existence of Republicans. He should know that his self-serving faction will always win in the end… unless they are in the way of other self-serving, of course.
Josh Hawley muzzled by cancel culture, with a brand new book deal, power saluted traitors for years, is also a self-serving liar from way back. “Ethics” are against Josh Hawley’s ethical standards. Madison Cawthorn , who got where he is today through self-serving lies, dabbled in truth this weekend, but you can tell it didn’t agree with him.
Marco Rubio complains that if he is continued to be allowed to filibuster, the Senate will never be able to function.
The Supreme Court has decided that Donald Trump might have “stolen”, but he did get away fair and square. Rudy Giuliani, however, might have to cough up that $1.3 billion it owes Dominion Voting Systems. Alex Jones owes everyone every cent he has. Jeffrey Clark helps out in one little coup and now he is a much bigger deal than he ever hoped to be.
Japan won't achieve herd immunity before the Olympics. We’re still heading for half a million deaths. Vaccines alone will not end the pandemic in the US. Hoping to lie out of COVID-19 death is still a popular remedy in Trump country.
Oh noes! EOs! President Joe Biden will issue a daily executive order because he can, and he should. Chuck Schumer helps out where he can. Don’t worry, Donald Trump’s not president, so Pat Leahy can take care of him. And yet, Democrats worry, because that’s what they do.
Fri, 22 January 2021
On Monday, Donald John Trump’s articles of impeachment will be delivered to the Senate, while the trauma of the January 6 insurgency is still fresh, and before Jonathan Turley injures himself twisting his rationale, and Republicans come up with any more bald-faced bad-faith lies.
No, wait. That is what they do… Also, the really wacky amongst them are liable to pull a weapon if caught, which they’ve been known to do from time to time. Knife wielding 25 term Congressman Don Young set off House metal detectors with the not-gun-shaped hunk of metal that he likes to carry. Rep. Andy Harris’ hunk of metal was definitely gun-shaped, and when he was caught, tried to slip it to another guy. Rep. Andy Biggs, Rep. Lauren Boebert, and Rep. Rick Allen showed up with hunks of metal, but we’ll never know what they were, as those folks were all waved through.
Time to get serious. With Trump out of the way, David has time to tackle the slightly abstruse processes around filibustering the organizing resolution. Actually, David always has the time to tackle the slightly abstruse processes around filibustering the organizing resolution. It’s just that now is an especially good time for that discussion. Committee appointments for Senators whose terms ended on January 3rd have expired, even though they've been reelected. Power sharing agreements need to take into consideration present committee makeups as well as future ones. Therefore, each committee needs to be scrutinized, with respect to incoming and outgoing Senate classes.
Thu, 21 January 2021
Wasn’t that so nice? President Joe Biden’s administration sure has higher production values and standards than Trump’s Presidential Apprentice. Much more likable cast, too. This show looks to have legs.
Is it only one day after “Day One”? Because, Joe Biden seems to already be weeks ahead on getting things done. He hasn’t golfed once, or even worn a tan suit. The President, has however said, “You’re fired!” to three of Donald Trump’s worst appointees. Joe makes this look so easy. After all, he has been practicing a while, and the fact is, Mr. Biden is also well suited for the position. Oh, and he won the election with a clear mandate.
All of this is hitting the Q-losers really hard. Without hate or fear, there isn’t much to rally behind. It’s killing right wing pundits, as fear and hate are what they use to pay their mortgages. Chasing after satire, Fox is now alarmed about COVID-19 deaths. Karl Rove pops out of some hole, shocked that the President pointed right at him and called him a racist. Republicans want Joe to understand that there can never be unity if there’s accountability.
Speaking of COVID-19 deaths, there sure are a lot of them, and the Trump administration somehow managed to have less than no plan to fix that. Joe Biden’s team’s “square one” therefore ends up being a mile behind the starting line. Former Mr. Olympia, Arnold Schwarzenegger, suggests everyone shut up and listen to the experts.
Democrats need a power sharing agreement with the Republicans… or is it the Patriot Party? Nuking the filibuster would seem to be the response, if no agreement on what “extraordinary circumstances" to use it is achieved.
Michael Flynn is a spy, but is his brother General Charles Flynn also an enemy agent? Someone stood the National Guard down on January 6, and Charles Flynn’s all-cap denials of being involved are turning out to be false.
Wed, 20 January 2021
David Waldman kept me sane. Probably you, too. Is it thick or is it thin today? Either way, we always have a Kagro in the Morning to help go through it. We sure needed a lot of KITMs to get us to today. We all needed a KITM on November 9, 2016, so we got one, and we sure need one today, so here we are. Yay! Let’s all go get our questions answered and our marbles corralled:
No, we won’t forget Donald Trump that easily, or so soon, unfortunately. You know Trump will be back in some other form, like herpes. Oh, Donald Trump will always be around. He'll be all around in the dark — Trump’ll be everywhere. Wherever you can look - wherever there's a fight, so hungry people can eat, He’ll be there. Wherever there's a cop beatin' up a guy, Donald'll be there. He'll be in the way guys yell when they're mad…. Wait. No. Sorry Q-balls! Donald Trump’ll be in Mar-a-Lago.
Donald couldn’t remember Joe or Kamala this morning, but his last night at the White House was full of reminiscing about old friends like sloppy Stephen KG Bannon, and Elliott Broidy, the guy that threw himself on that Clearblue landmine to save Trump’s life back in ‘Nam, and uhm... Lil Wayne and Kodak Black. The rest aren’t “really friends” per se, it’s more like they have “shared interests”. Regrets go out to Rudy Giuliani and the kids, better luck next time!
Anyhow, Rudy is still finishing up his felonies and missed the deadline. Lauren Boebert just started, and isn’t even sure what the word “tour” means. Senator Ron Johnson is unhinged and uninformed, so the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel set him straight, with footnotes. Most of the nation’s Republican state attorneys general may have invalidated their own positions.
The one tap Trump turned off to the swamp, he made certain that he turned back on before he left. Joe will turn it back off. Looneys will still loon, but white power will shrink. Democracy gets another chance, but Donald Trump needs to be convicted first.
Robinette, eh? I’ll have to get used to typing that and many other cheerful things. The United States Joint Congressional Committee on Inaugural Ceremonies did a pretty good job today, especially whoever came up with selecting Amanda Gorman. Welcome to the new world! If Mitch and Chuck can come together on the filibuster, or even if they don’t, things are looking up.
Tue, 19 January 2021
The curtain can’t come down hard enough on Donald Trump tomorrow, but today is Presidential Apprentice’s not-(fingers crossed)-so big finale! Lil Wayne gets pardoned! Tiffany is engaged! It’s the craptacular ending we always hoped for! Lucky for us, we have David Waldman and Joan McCarter on KITM today for some quality time:
Now is, of course, the time to “look forward, not back”... Forward to Donald Trump’s impeachment trial, and his dozen or so court appearances over the next few years. Sure, Trump can be impeached, convicted, barred from ever holding office again—even after he's gone. Jonathan Turley expertly changes his position on impeachment of former officials, following the Republican tradition of picking a result and reasoning backwards.
Trump’s trials can start a minute after the Inaugural, but will probably be later. The priority now is getting through the Inaugural, a little over a week from the largest security breach in Washington DC in over 200 years. Riley June Williams and other key players have been caught, but there’s plenty of Quazy people still on the loose. Two U.S. Army National Guard members have been found to have ties to fringe right group militias and are probably receiving less than they deserve today. Thankfully, vetting National Guard members ahead of national special security events is routine. Texas Governor Greg Abbott would never question the behavior of Texas National Guard, especially once they showed their mettle in the Jade Helm wars of ‘15.
A teacher called to DC for the National Guard holds class from a Humvee.
Tomorrow afternoon we have a lot to look forward to in the Joe Biden presidency. Joe, Nancy Pelosi, and Chuck Schumer will take on Trump’s impeachment, but won’t let it get in the way of everything else, including Biden’s plan to cut child poverty in half. Chuck Schumer and Mitch McConnell share a 50-50 Senate, but Chuck gets the bigger half. Setting committee sizes and membership will be the focus now, with the experience of the closely divided Senate of 2001 as a guide.
Mon, 18 January 2021
Only 6 more hours of KITM before the inauguration! David Waldman and Greg Dworkin make these two hours count:
It is a hopeful Martin Luther King Day, full of fresh starts and new chances. Donald Trump, never really president, is almost... almost an ex-president. It’s time to repent, to heal, shun abominations, and if not smash, at least put a little distance on the false idols.
BTW, Donald J. Trump is one crazy MF… Axios believes it all went off the rails with one premeditated lie. Which lie, and which time it went off the rails, might be up for debate, but that fact is certain. Once off the rails, fewer sane people told Donald what he wanted to hear, and now he is almost out of insane ones as well.
The FBI is vetting National Guard troops in DC amid fears of an insider attack at the inauguration. An Army reservist who federal investigators say has secret-level security clearance and a long record of posting his extremist views online still somehow not only had secret-level security clearance, but was also somehow still an Army reservist. Darwin H.M., @Darwin_Darko, calculates the total number of times those in service to their country should be allowed to violate their oaths in treason, and comes up with “zero”. When you are “off-duty”, you aren’t “off-vows”. Where there’s smoke, there’s fire. It might not be much every time, but too much caution is exactly what is required presently.
The FBI is not suffering for a lack of evidence on the people they are coming for on crimes committed January 6. There’s the white supremacist that wore an ankle monitor to the riots. The leader of “Cowboys for Trump” might earn a trip to boot hill when all is said and done. And, there’s Riley June Williams, an active seditionist, who is suspected of going Ethel Rosenberg with a laptop stolen from Nancy Pelosi’s office. Mom can’t hide her forever.
Perhaps the January 6th insurrectionists can pick up a bulk discount on Trump pardons? Rioters aren’t the only ones just following orders. Josh Hawley, Ted Cruz and newbie Lauren Boebert are also heading toward their downfall. Donald can invoke the Insurrection Act but that won’t stop his bum’s rush out of town, noon Wednesday. Then Trump can be impeached, convicted, and barred from ever holding office again. Thursday, Jonathan Turley can let Donald sleep on his couch until the DA finds him some new digs up in New York.
Fri, 15 January 2021
David Waldman delivers us to the weekend before the denouement of Presidential Apprentice:
If you are a regular listener to KITM, you are probably aware that Donald J. Trump, and the Trump administration really suck. As you will be gratified to hear, it seems that word is finally getting around. It’s never too late to catch up to news — except for those people whose lives have already been destroyed, or ended, of course. Nonetheless, under 30% of all Americans is still a pretty big basket of deplorables, and they aren’t listening to anyone. And, plenty of politicians would kill for a voting bloc like them, therefore they’re ready and willing to step up and take a shot. Watch out for up and comers like Madison Cawthorn, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and Josh Hawley in coming weeks. No really, don’t turn your back on them.
There is one thing that a 29% approval can do for Donald Trump. It can get him convicted. Dead-ender Tom Cotton misinforms his low-information base. You however, are well acquainted with the story of William W. Belknap, civil war hero, later an out-of-office impeached scalawag. You know that there is also plenty of time and space to handle ex-president Trump’s impeachment. Journalists that only read up on the process of impeachment in the House and Senate only know half of the story. David reminds them, and us, of consideration of practice and precedent in the upcoming impeachment trial.
Let’s talk about something nice. Joe Biden and Chuck Schumer are two nice guys set to fix COVID-19 relief for the people that need it. Biden wants to increase stimulus checks to $2,000, sort of. At least, that is how some people add it up. Others don’t see it quite that way, including Cori Bush, and bill author Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.
Thu, 14 January 2021
David Waldman, Greg Dworkin and thou make a beautiful combination to get through a Thursday like this:
Donald J. Trump, who no one likes, is a traitor, and the worst president ever, was impeached again yesterday. He doesn’t know why. Hope Hicks isn’t there to explain it to him. Donald is sure that it is somebody’s fault however, probably Rudy’s. Trump is certain that if he went to the Capitol yesterday he would have negotiated himself a much better deal — but now look at what all the losers did to his brand! He won’t get a outhouse named after him after this. Disney is moving his animatronics over to “It’s a Small World” now. Even Hydroxychloroquine pushers don’t want to be associated with him. Trump is so bummed that he might never give out a pardon again.
Anti-democracy Republicans in Virginia and Georgia are being stripped of their committee memberships. Capitol police now have to make people go “through” the metal detector.
All of this because of just a few little coup attempts. “Where is our unity?” wonders the Gop. As usual, once they are personally threatened, Republicans turn around. Unfortunately, some of them have already been personally threatened to keep their backs turned, even if it means a few of their co-workers lives. Republicans were giving Capitol tours to insurrectionists because that seemed safer than telling them no. Instead, it made it increasingly more dangerous for everyone, for the foreseeable future. Rioters believe they were sent by Trump. Many believe Trump was sent by God. There was a huge police presence in DC on January 6th, but the problem was, they weren’t with the good guys.
Trump knew what was about to go down, but the question is, how many of the rioters knew? @LiteraryMouse has already amassed a huge amount of data on who knew how much, and how much that mattered. For instance, think of the celebrity sightings! Meanwhile, the guy photographed with his feet up on a desk had his potential sentence upped by a decade — Thanks William Barr!
Also, thanks to those in the media that are finally figuring out how to tell it like it is. Kind of late, but better than the alternative. We’re just beginning to find out the corruption at the 2017 inaugural!
Wed, 13 January 2021
Welcome to the second annual Donald J. Trump impeachment! David Waldman, Greg Dworkin, and I have a million things to share with you today. Somehow we’ve compressed it down to about 2 hours and a few thousand links:
Donald went to not-the Alamo and found out no one remembered to tell them he was coming. There weren’t many places in Texas that he could have gone to anyhow. If only Trump had his Twitter, he could’ve stopped the violence coming. If he had Parler, Donald could’ve been king of the idiots.
The January 6 raid on the Capitol was an inside job. The insurrectionists knew what to do and where to go. So, who were those inside men and women? The list of suspects is quite short, considering how many future assassins and general knuckleheads wait in the wings. New metal detectors installed in Congress have proven very effective in detecting assholes, although those folks were hardly hiding before. Besides, if you can’t convince them to wear masks, how can you take their guns? Incoming House freshmen have discovered the jerks and cowards in their midst. Kevin McCarthy warned to not point out Republicans voting for impeachment because looneys might kill them. The CIA sees Americans being indoctrinated and radicalized like Islamic terrorists, but ISIS couldn’t have dreamt of surrounding the Capitol and systematically assassinating lawmakers.
Republicans are getting kind of tired of Donald Trump. In reality, they hated him before he was elected, after he was elected, and will be glad to see him gone. Mitch McConnell might give him a swift kick in the ass to help him out the door. Trump's approval rating has cratered in his final days as it turns out that few Americans can really support a cartoon supervillain. The US Chamber of Commerce supports democracy. New York City is terminating its Trump contracts. Pro-Trump DC is getting cancelled, evan as a group promises $50 million to Republicans that vote to impeach. Therefore, Five House Republicans will be voting for impeachment and there will be more. Nancy Pelosi has named the Managers for the unification of American society. Too bad we can’t put all the Trumps on the docket and bring true peace.
Tue, 12 January 2021
The Big Lie and the Big Liar head to Texas today, for yet another last stand. Nothing will shut Donald Trump up, but soon, one way or the other, he won’t be saying it as President. Of course, plenty of dangerous crazy morons will continue to believe him, even as their boats sit at the bottoms of lakes across the country. Some dangerous crazy morons are well-placed politically, like boat-sinker Kristina Malimon, of the the Young Republicans of Oregon, and Turning Point USA. Freedom Caucus chair Andy Biggs can tell you, and will soon be telling the FBI, that he and three House Republicans organized the January 6 rally. Derrick Evans, West Virginia lawmaker and anti-abortion radical, shouted “Derrick Evans is in the Capitol!” on a live stream, which was actually the truth. On the other hand, Charlie Kirk is trying to hide the truth of how many busses of insurgents he shipped in, in an attempt to lie about the attempted murders that insurgents committed. Armed statehouse protests were rehearsals for the Capitol insurgency. Those rehearsals continue. State and local police, veterans and not-so-veterans are rehearsing with them.
(A not big, very small lie: You know the guy that died from tasering himself right in the Tip O’Neill area of the Capitol? Well, his wife will tell you his testicles are just fine, thank you. Apocryphal or not, he’ll always be ball-tased in our hearts.)
By the way, you don’t need “flex cuffs” to slowly torture and murder people… it probably helps, though. For example, at least 9 Gop lawmakers refused to wear masks during the Capitol lockdown, and they managed to bag at least two Democrats, including Representative Pramila Jayapal. Dark money behind Republican state attorneys general organized the protests before the insurrection. Meanwhile, money out in the sunlight can’t afford to hang out with insurrectionist Republicans.
The 25th Amendment, impeachment, and expulsion of Trump Republicans are all under consideration in House of Representatives. You bet the House has the votes to impeach Trump again, but if you know the process, and you do if you are a listener, you know that today’s the day the House will vote to tell Mike Pence to activate section 4 of the 25th Amendment, and tomorrow comes the impeachment vote.
Mon, 11 January 2021
David Waldman, Greg Dworkin and even Armando are on today, to answer each other’s questions, and likely yours too:
For a guy raised up by God, Donald Trump sure is catching Hell. Fiery Irony seems to be pouring down from the heavens lately. The Black police officer hero (and should-be recipient of Biden’s first Presidential Medal) is named GOODMAN, for God’s sake. Eugene Goodman used his skin, uniform and quick wits to lure and outsmart a bloodthirsty mob, saving countless lives — and probably the mob’s lives as well... and maybe the mob’s mom's lives.
Twitter threw out the trash, then put together clues that led to the arrest of zippy the commando and many others who were safely arrested, away from their buddies. The tracking chips injected into rioters’
Impeachment II — this time, it’s personal. The 25th Amendment, impeachment, and expulsion of Trump Republicans are all under consideration in House. Some won’t happen, some can’t happen. (at least today) Armando and David can tell the difference between what could happen and what isn’t happening, and are happy to tell you too!
Fri, 8 January 2021
David Waldman brings us the latest William Belknap news and opinions, and much, much more today!
Donald Trump made his long-awaited pivot yesterday, but you got to hope this won’t break Democrats’ stride toward action. Republican senators now (anonymously) regret not doing more to contain Trump. Donald, Jared, Ivanka, etc. could not be contacted for comment.
Remember when you see Capitol Police retreating from mobs, there’s an unarmed videographer running backwards beside them. Three New York Times journalists were at the Capitol when it was breached and can tell you how that felt.
Outside, the DC Guard and others stood down, leaving U.S.Capitol Police alone on the front lines, dying. Metaphorically, they’re still taking bullets today, with the Capitol Chief resigning, and the Senate sergeant-at-arms now fired. Donald Trump is less metaphorically killing off his own fan base, as well.
Donald Trump promised he’d be right there with the rioters, but you know how he prefers to watch stuff on the TV. After all, the only thing Donald is able to control is a switcher. Fresh out of lines, Don Jr. tried to capture his father’s love before the Capitol assault, but instead returned to shooting Kim Guilfoyle working it to “Gloria”.
Republican Mary Miller, Illinois' 15th Congressional District, 5th column, wanted to point out how unappreciated Adolf Hitler is these days, an opinion that is rightfully unappreciated. Dominion Voting Systems plan to deliver $1.3 Billion of stfu to Sidney Powell.
Lauren Boebert wants to Q-aucus a right wing Squad, but for her it’s every posse for itself. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has bigger concerns, and bigger clout. Democrats limit their effectiveness by holding themselves to standards that Republicans long ago abandoned. Finally, they are stepping away from PAYGO rules, at least for bills relating to COVID and climate change.
Thu, 7 January 2021
David Waldman, broadcasting from the center of our vast KITM World Headquarters, phones Greg Dworkin down in the laundry room, to discuss all that happened yesterday:
Did you read my summary yesterday? No? Well, I don’t blame you. Yesterday was pretty crazy. Yesterday, I was certain Trumpers would be no challenge to Capitol police. The day before, I thought even the idea of an assault on the House chamber to be an outlandish joke. Imagine my surprise to find attitudes change so quickly.
Otherwise, it wasn’t much of a surprise. The forces of white entitlement, white supremacy and white lunacy amassed in DC, and statehouses across the country. Some of the assembled mob believed they were literally going to war. A few of them might have been surprised on all what that entails, but plenty sure as hell knew what they were doing. The rioters might have looked like jokes but they weren’t joking, and everyone knew it. Rudy Giuliani tried to subvert the will of the people, but called the wrong Senator.
Violent insurrection is what Donald Trump wanted. He already goaded a mob to seize the capitol in Lansing, Michigan, and he used social media to attempt a coup. He and the gang are being deplatformed 5 years too late, and it’s not nearly enough anymore. William Barr, Mick Mulvaney, along with several others of the Trump administration, many Republicans, and all the other presidents can tell you it is not enough anymore. Democrats on the House Judiciary Committee have called on Mike Pence to invoke the 25th Amendment. Of course, it was only yesterday that Mike got his big boy pants pulled up, so that might be a big ask.
Speaking of Mike, Politico’s “Congress Reporter”, Kyle Cheney misspoke about a discovery that he misconstrued as Pence manipulation of the electoral count, when in fact it is a parliamentarian hero story.
Wed, 6 January 2021
A million things to talk about today! A million things to talk about happening right now! All can pretty much be summed up as Donald J. Trump is a loser. A lose-lose, looooozy, lose, loser. Just how much of a loser is Donald Trump? David Waldman and Greg Dworkin have pondered that question for years, and yet have difficulty reaching a conclusion, as Donald Trump keeps losing, and losing... Of course, it’s not only Trump, but those Republicans lashed to Trump also losing, and losing. Today, they get to all lose again. Tonight, they all will get to lose again. Donald Trump and Mitch McConnell have made sure that losing is the Republican way of life for a long time to come. If the Gop is capable of embarrassment, today will be one of the most embarrassing days in history for them. Clay Higgins won’t be showing up with his preposterous of evidence. Alternate, and alternate-alternate slates of electors won’t be counted into record. Trump lost and Josh Hawley will have to accept it.
With so many losing, somebody’s got to be winning, and it turns out that it is us. States across the Union were able to ship their idiots over to DC for a while. Just stay away from them, and we’ll do just fine, that’s what the police are for. (3:00pm ET update, I was wrong.) Oh, and did you hear? We get the Senate. Donald tried to shuffle executives around in order to rig the Georgia vote, but it looks as if once again the margin of victory will be too big for him. Voters turned out big in Georgia, and they weren’t Team Republican. If Democrats don’t screw with them, they will keep voting for them.
Pennsylvania state government is the banana republic federal Republicans can only dream about, as Democrat Lt. Gov. John Fetterman was forcibly removed as presiding officer and democratically elected Democrat Jim Brewster was refused to be seated by Republicans in the majority.
The EPA announced that they will limit the use of “science” because they can’t figure out how to anonymize medical data. Meanwhile, women who miscarry in OH have to rsvp their stalkers. Hey remember the COVID-19 pandemic? In California, a freezer breaks, but the vaccination line keeps moving, while in Nebraska, the Governor returns to the smallpox blanket method of eliminating undesirables.
Tue, 5 January 2021
Tomorrow, Republicans could replace Senate Democrats with exact body doubles. Proud Boys could rappel through the ceiling of the House chamber. Or maybe, it will be just a “regular order” legislative day. Who knows? Well, David Waldman, Armando, and Joan McCarter have some pretty good guesses on today’s KITM:
Republicans are, yes, in disarray. Mitch McConnell is subtly steering the party… in that he has let go of the steering wheel and ducked into his shell. Chuck Grassley pushes Pence aside and takes control — to clarify, if Mike needs to powder his nose, Chuck can, you know, kind of step in.
Mike Pence is exactly the guy John Nance Garner told you about, except that he’s more lukewarm than average Vice Presidents. Mike can’t do a thing, even if he does show up. Look, it’s all right there in the 12th Amendment, The Electoral Count Act of 1887, and US Code 3, Section 15 — unless it isn’t — then there are still precedents, processes and procedures — unless there aren’t — and then there are still a few backups to go to. The good news is that Donald Trump hasn’t got many more backups to go to before he’s completely out of oxygen, so to speak.
The Proud Boys leader was arrested, depriving his troops of a leader right before their glorious day tomorrow. Oh, well, they can still attend in Antifa-face if they want. Republican Chip Roy was rational last weekend, but today he’s back at work, predicting an actual civil war if Georgia votes yankee one more time.
Ossoff and Warnock aren’t the only good things coming our way if they win. Already progressives have won a rules change that would allow Medicare for All, a Green New Deal or other big reform agenda items to be exempted from paygo rules. The House is changing its rules to permit committee chair to reissue subpoenas, which should come in handy almost immediately.
Mon, 4 January 2021
This week we have entered a time paradox in which we hurdle towards January 6th, while January 7th feels like it’s moving farther away. David Waldman and Greg Dworkin deftly pilot us toward the black hole:
Donald Trump packed a few more impeachable and criminal, or at least censurable offenses into the weekend with the 19th phone call to Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger, to beg/extort one more vote than Joe Biden. Lindsey Graham and Rudy Giuliani tried in the past, but none can steal Donald’s wackadoodle thunder, as he showed he could Leeroy Jenkins with the best of them. That makes Raffensperger the big hero — nah, he isn’t. The Georgia Gop is still out to steal this election, as well as any future ones, but with more finesse. And, if they can’t pilfer the Ossoff/Warnock tickets, they can now blame it on Trump.
Which all brings us to Wednesday’s coup. Yesterday, Democrats could have done something. Republican Chip Roy did. Louie Gohmert could’ve opposed Congress' Electoral College rules, but it slipped his “mind”. So, we know what will come next, and it does not include Trump or Trump-Republicans winning. This might not matter to them, as their goal is to piss in the well and show loyalty to the Confederacy. Devin Nunes and Jim Jordan won their Cross of Honor. Can Marjorie Taylor Greene be enough of an asshole to qualify in these closing days? Yes, she can!
A hospital staffer sought to lift spirits, but instead aerosolized coronavirus with his “unnamed” holiday themed inflatable costume. The Feds might cut vaccine doses in half so that twice as many Americans feel like they have been vaccinated. At least overall, we should be getting smarter soon.
Fri, 1 January 2021
It’s a brand-new show for a brand new year! Scott Anderson has got the day off, so it falls to me to summarize today’s show. And boy, do I ever not want to do that!
So I will warn you in advance that I intend to half-ass it!
The Senate advanced their work in overriding the NDAA veto yesterday, and everyone’s a little bit puzzled as to how it’s going down, and what it means for the prospect (if there ever was any) for $2,000 relief checks before this Congress dissolves. In the meantime, maybe just ask Moscow Mitch directly.
In coronavirus news, a nurse who got his first dose of vaccine has caught the ‘rona in-between jabs. But don’t worry! That actually doesn’t mean much. Masking appears to have helped India tamp down on the virus’ spread, though there’s some debate over how widespread the practice really is. Meanwhile, Russia appears to be ‘fessing-up to its real losses. Here in the US, we may not be systematically underreporting losses, but we’re not covering them as aggressively as we could be. More dopey Republicans have walked straight into the COVID buzzsaw.
Good news! Trump is finally taking “action” about those bounties on our troops! The bad news is, he’s only targeting China for it.
Republican nutcases are still plotting to put on a futile display of upending our democracy. But some of the key Republican players on Jan. 6 probably aren’t on board. Arizona’s own Republican nutcases might have really stepped in it.
As a parting New Year’s present, here’s a plausible theory for invalidating some of Trump’s impeachment-connected pardons.
Thu, 31 December 2020
David Waldman rings out the old year today, but don’t expect any ringing in of the new until Monday’s KITM:
Mike Pence cancelled his trip to Israel and Donald Trump cancelled his appearance at Mar-a-Lago’s New Year’s Eve party. Some people have a bad feeling about this. It’s probably not good news, but it might not be bad news. After all, early and youth voting in Georgia is freaking out Trump and the Gop, and that’s good. There’s also the chance that Donald doesn’t really know or care who Ossoff and Warnock are. So, maybe Trump is returning to see what he can do to get $2000 to people in need… Yeah, we know that he came back to plot with fellow dimwit grifters and double-dealing sycophants on one last big heist while they still can.
Ok, the COVID-19 pandemic took us a little off guard, but then everyone understood for at least 9 months the need for a fast, coordinated rollout so… WTF? Greg Dworkin, who developed strategies a decade or so ago, rounds up the screw ups. The system is showing plenty of weak links, along with the problem of people cutting in line, while scores at the head are now refusing to take the shot. Any solution that keeps the line moving might be the best solution. Also, a temperature snag delayed vaccine shipments to Texas, just as a Wisconsin hospital employee deliberately removed almost 600 doses from refrigeration.
Ian Reifowitz calls in during the last half hour (Make a resolution to pick up a copy of Ian’s “The Tribalization of Politics: How Rush Limbaugh's Race-Baiting Rhetoric on the Obama Presidency Paved the Way for Trump”) to discuss all of the above topics and events, and to describe where Donald Trump and the Republican party would be be without their history of race and class resentment. (They would be where there weren’t any votes, for sure.)
Wed, 30 December 2020
Armando’s in the house! Virtually — and Greg Dworkin, and of course, David Waldman, so you’d expect a process and umbrage filled KITM. Not so much umbrage as you might expect, though. Of course, Donald Trump has earned every bit of disdain he’s received, and then some. It’s just that Donald and the 2020 nightmares are ending and COVID help is coming. What can Trump do now, other than get a few people, or a few thousand, or a few million, killed?
Almost Louisiana Congressman Luke Letlow felt masks were optional. So is COVID, for that matter. Healthy people are dying when their own antibodies respond to COVID by killing them. If the goal is to reach 80% of Americans vaccinated, we aren’t getting there with this administration. Elderly in Florida are given one more big chance to die from COVID while in line for the vaccine.
Onto process! Which, as KITM listeners know better than anyone else, is the way this whole thing will get fixed… or destroyed. Mitch McConnell is poison-pilling survival checks going into New Years. That’s ok by Trump, he likes poisoning more than paying. Bernie Sanders and Nancy Pelosi are prepared to spend the holiday prying the additions and a few Republicans off the bill.
Trump is filing a petition to the Supreme Court on Wisconsin now. Even judges are trolling the Kraken strike force. Few surprises there… well, maybe a few, but those will be later. The next big show is on January 6, when the seditious circus rolls into town. Mike Pence probably won’t go Manchurian for Louie Gohmert after all. MIke was planning to bug out on the 7th to the middle east where it’s safe, but even that plan is in doubt.
You have less than a week to study up on the electoral college certification process! Not that anything will come from these shenanigans, mind you, but if you want to follow half of what will be said on this show the next few days, it’s a must.
Tue, 29 December 2020
It’s Two Topic Tuesday on KITM! The glimmer of civilization today in the form of $2000 survival checks, and our subsequent collapse into barbarism 8 days later. David Waldman brings on Joan McCarter, busy the last few days installing a new house inside of her old house, for discussion and analysis:
Thank you, Donald Trump! Donald self-served America right into Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’ hands. Even Kelly Loeffler and David Perdue are beginning to feel the Bern! Mitch McConnell is now on the hot seat after the House passes its $2000 direct COVID-19 payments bill. Mitch didn’t listen the first 9000 times or so, but Democrats might have his attention today. (No, I guess not. Dems will keep on knocking)
Republicans, now fans of socialism, hope to check out communism next week. Louie Gohmert believes it’s time for Mike Pence to play a little solitaire, but will the red queen come through for the Red revolution? Arizona bolshevists tried to deliver forged votes, assisted by fellow-travelling apparatchiks. Luckily, security measures were in place and held. We now know their exact plan of attack, but that doesn’t mean they’re not out there, still scheming.
Oh, and one more thing, lest we forget. We are still dying by the thousands, each and every day, from COVID-19. Donald Trump’s Operation Warp Speed choked like a dog, and is guaranteed by design to continue to fail.
Mon, 28 December 2020
David Waldman returns from his long St. Stephen’s Day weekend, wrenned out but raring to go into our dramatic denouement of The Presidential Apprentice! Will it be an end to an era? Well, there were plenty of transparently corrupt megalomaniacs before Donald Trump showed up, and there will be plenty of self-serving dim-wits after he’s gone, yet probably no one will be able to lose so ungracefully and so often, again and again.
Trump’s art of the deal remains the same: He demands whatever comes to mind, takes what he can get, says the fix is in, and then declares victory. Donald is always simple. It’s the responses that have to be complex. Even suspension of the rules have a lot of rules to follow.
Last week, Donald stopped golfing to lose on COVID-19 relief, the omnibus spending bill and the defense policy bill, and yesterday he interrupted his golf game to lose them again, and again. You’d think Donald and his followers would be sick of losing by now, but unfortunately that’s just not the case. Trump will golf while America burns. Greg Dworkin joins us to discuss how we could survive the next few weeks, and thrive into the future.
Donald Trump is responsible for the death of 1 out of every 1000 Americans from COVID-19, and that’s just the start. The good news is that antibody therapies could help many, and that less people are fearing the vaccines. COVID-19 will keep bringing chaos to Washington.
Fri, 25 December 2020
It's a Wonderful Rerun!
Enjoy our Boxing Day 2019 extravaganza!
Whether you are post, pre, or peri holiday, enjoy it informed with David Waldman on today’s KITM:
Greg Dworkin rounds up the polls and punditry of recent Christmas past:
The more people understand the impeachment process, the more they would like to apply it to Donald Trump. As the election approaches, voters are still figuring out what needs to be done. Of course Republicans would prefer they went in the other direction, any other direction, or even no direction, at this point they don’t care. You fact checking them makes you part of the joke. Christians take a break from the heads of pins to divide over pinheads. Trump supporters aren’t racists, but… they absolutely are. The fight over the 1619 Project shows that we are far from where we pretend to be on race.
It did take a while, but Chuck Todd has begun to notice some dissembling by Trump mouthpieces. Is Chuck just plain stupid, or strategically stupid? How did someone like Chuck Todd even get here? David knows, and reveals Todd’s early days and The Hotline ethos. We are deep in an epistemic crisis and need to claw back to reality.
Thu, 24 December 2020
David Waldman, opens today’s KITM yawning like the MGM lion, waking us up for Christmas eve:
Donald Trump keeps handing out pardons like moist candy canes to anyone that met him under the mistletoe over the last few years. Donald pardoned Jesse Benton as a gift to his employers, Ron Paul and Mitch McConnell and the uncle of Benton's wife, Rand Paul… (Jesse will probably be Matt Gaetz’ son by the end of the day.) Trump pardoned a former Maryland police officer whose heart he knew was in the right place. (They need to be arrested faster than Trump can pardon them.) Merry Christmas! Trump’s Blackwater pardons aren’t bringing much cheer to their victim’s families, however. There’s bound to be more today, but Dad’s saving the nicest ones for under the tree in Mar-a-Lago.
Greg Dworkin reminds us that actually, Donald Trump doesn’t give gifts to anyone but himself. If he can take someone else’s gift, it’s even better. Merry F***ing Christmas to everyone in Congress with the Gop at each other’s throats and Democrats trying to pull $2000 checks out of the fireplace. It seems that Trump might be a little over his head still on how government works, or how reality works for that matter. Kelly Loeffler, too. Two Republican House members voted by proxy — while simultaneously suing to ban the use of proxy voting .
Ron DeSantis figures, why appoint experts when he can be the guy that says expert things? Rep.-elect Luke Letlow checked himself into the hospital for no particular reason, and is now thinking about checking out the ICU for the holidays. People who are immunocompromised or otherwise allow coronavirus to hang around for while might encourage unfortunate mutations.
Did Bill Barr arrest Lev Parnas to keep him from testifying against Donald Trump? Did a Democratic House candidate lose by 6 votes after 22 votes were improperly excluded in Iowa? Did the Kansas City Star misreport on Black Kansas Citians for generations? Yes.
Wed, 23 December 2020
David Waldman always throws the best Festivus, and today’s KITM might be the most festive ever. Think of all the grievances to air! As usual, Greg Dworkin brings on his feats of strength, and along with the pandemic and Trump guarantees a bottomless Festivus for all of us:
People forget, but Donald Trump is the GREATEST RINO, of ALL TIME. Republicans have strived to disremember that for years, but yesterday, Donald made certain to ring their bell, but good. Republicans spent hundreds of days pinching coronavirus relief down to 600 bucks, however Trump would rather it was up at AOC levels, maybe even a bit more if Nancy Pelosi gives him any guff about it.
All we need are a few more RINOs, or maybe some real Rs, to get this relief bill out. A motion to suspend the Rules could do the trick, but that would need to be done now, and how often does that happen? Unanimous consent would work, but there’s always some troublemaker.
RINOs might as well come out of hiding, because the shakeout’s coming soon. Trump’s staff can’t lie to themselves forever, now that Bill Barr is gone, and really, there is only so much a pardon can do for them. The Trump state might think someone is looking out for them, but on the other hand, it could be Iranian agents. Mark Meadows went to Georgia to twist some arms, but found only cold shoulders.
Wow, does the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts suck now, or what? Who knows what someone will need to do to get a grant nowadays… perhaps new board member, and Donald pal, Melania pal, Ghislaine Maxwell pal, and former Jeffrey Epstein pal, Paolo Zampolli would have an idea or two.
Tue, 22 December 2020
We’re still sponging down the scorched wallpaper here at KITM World Headquarters following Greg Dworkin’s F-arama yesterday, even as David Waldman wants to autotune the year’s profanity into “Christmas carols”... That’s sure to get us at least a mention on maybe three Fox shows and might even resurrect Bill O’Reilly’s career!
Meanwhile, Donald Trump hopes to make the next 30 days an amalgamation of the Alamo and Custer’s Last Stand, except with no hope, nor honor, and everyone is sacrificed to save him. Of course, some recall the negative effect this had on Davy Crockett’s congressional career, and will take a step back as the strike force is mowed down like a Trump dog. Geraldo and Pat Robertson already donned their bonnets and shawls and exited out the back, while Jared Kushner and Mike Pence discovered they have very important business far away from the parapets. William Barr says there’s no basis for seizing voting machines, using special counsels, or for him sticking around anymore. Sebastian Gorka would rather talk about how it feels to lose, rather than, you know... On the ground, cosplay militias don’t really care who they’re fighting, or why, but they’ve all been waiting for this moment, whatever it is.
South Carolina’s first lady tested positive for coronavirus after a White House Christmas party, and what do you know, so did the Governor. Also, hundreds of thousands of others... and a few thousand died last night.
Joan McCarter popped in for her pre-holiday visit, to tell us all who is naughty and nice in DC.
Rand Paul’s insufferability will outlast any pandemic. After the apocalypse, the remaining cockroaches will despise him. Then there’s Mitch McConnell. Mitch didn’t get his Christmas gift to corporations, but he was able to hurt their workers before the holidays. Hey, but 600 bucks isn’t nothing! Ok, it almost is, but the savings on 3 martini lunches sure will add up.
If Donald pardons himself, will he be rubber or glue? Joe might find out.
Mon, 21 December 2020
Believe it or not, today is the darkest day of 2020… or longest, depending on your perspective. Volcanoes erupt! Meteors fall! Giant planets conjunct! And, Greg Dworkin cusses like a !&?@#!#%&! in today’s opening discussion with David Waldman! Greg has a point. Republicans are F***ers, f***ing the nation and…
E.g., Donald Trump. Covid vaccines and Russian hacks mean nothing to that fuck. The New York Times style guide apparently needs to be revised to add the F word, “military coup”, “installing seditious agents”, “fomenting insurrection”, ”trafficking stolen property”, etc. As the Germans say — “WUT”?
Trump and Trumpists continue to fight to hold their criminal organization. Getting rid of Trump won’t get rid of Trumpism. A Republican with a conscience is primaried to the right. A Democrat with a conscience… is primaried to the right. Republicans prefer their trolley car exercises not be televised for this reason. Of course, some people have a crazy thing for very bad boys. Those people will miss their statue of Robert E. Lee, removed from the Capitol this morning. That statue will be updated with one of American civil rights leader-pioneer Barbara Johns, who wasn’t bad or a boy. Virginia will continue to pull down racist commemorations, even in the face of confederate parroting.
Churches can help stop COVID-19 rather than spread it. African-Americans don’t trust vaccines for a reason, and churches can help reach out. Of course, the coronavirus is mutating, it wouldn’t be 2020 without that.
Fri, 18 December 2020
David Waldman delivers the Friday KITM on time, every time, pretty much:
When will this election be over? Oh, that’s right, the election was over November 3rd, December 8th, December 14th and dozens of dates in between... It’ll be over on December 23rd, the deadline for certificates of the states’ electoral votes to be received, and January 6th, when the votes are counted by Congress, and every day to Inauguration day and every day until November 5th, 2024.
Meanwhile... Kayleigh Mcenany jockeys for alternative employment at a place she can report alternative facts. Pennsylvania congressmen sacrifice their positions and their state to keep their Trump troll alive. Trump lawyers ask that Wisconsin be lopped off as well. Arkansas Republicans will wait to see if Arkansas is still around on January 20th before making a decision. Tommy Tuberville is too new to have picked up much of that “Trump sienna” shade to his nose, and knows this might be his last chance. Arizona cosplay electors are trying to pass forged electoral ballots because, why not? David explains the why not, and also the what next.
Like “trickle down” economics, no one even pretends to believe this is real unless they’re part of the grift. That’s why people like failed traffic court lawyer Jenna Ellis became Trump’s lead attorney. Even Donald Trump isn’t stupid enough to believe it. The last thing of value Trump has to hock are pardons, and after that... who needs him?
Well, there is market for nuclear secrets, for sure. It would be just like Donald to sell the lot at fire sale prices, or even less, wouldn’t it? Without Trump or anonymous shell companies, where can international villains make their investments? The Pentagon shuts off Biden transition briefings, just in case. (We are only a few weeks from Trump aids pooping in desk drawers.)
Instead of wall sconces and copper wiring, some Republicans, such as Interior Secretary David Bernhardt are leaving with a load of coronavirus. Alabama Congressman Mike Rogers also did his part for herd immunity. Hey — how about a national inoculation celebration day?
Thu, 17 December 2020
A Nor'easter blasted, strangely enough, the Northeast last night. Greg Dworkin’s forest friends worked around the clock but couldn’t dig him out before showtime. Lucky for us, David Waldman pretty much lives at KITM World Headquarters and was able to pull a solo shift:
Where’s that Rose Garden executive gibbet? Of course, we still have a month — or so — to put things right for future historians. 300,000+ American deaths, 3000+ per day don’t seem sufficient to move the public to action. It was plenty enough for the Trump administration to obfuscate and suppress information, however. Mentally ill Michael Caputo’s sociopathic sidekick, Paul Alexander plotted to infect infants, kids and teens, until he killed just enough people to open local bars. “Freedom Flu”, as it would have been called had Emmanuel Macron not caught it, wasn’t considered that big a deal 6 months ago by conservatives… at least non-investors.
The latest conservative non-urgency is Russia’s recent declaration of war on the United States. Arson might be good strategy for covering up crimes. Former House Foreign Affairs director Paul Behrends didn’t quite dodge all of the falling pianos and anvils one night. Donald Trump barely got the unscalable walls erected around the White House before waves of pardon seekers began their siege. Pamela Anderson adds a Julian Assange verse to her Trump rendition of “Santa Baby”.
A lot fell apart during the Trump administration, but there is one thing the Republicans hope to raise higher than anyone ever could imagine… “The Bar” Democrats better mind their Ps and Qs and Fs in our hallowed halls of government!
Wed, 16 December 2020
David Waldman wrestled his Christmas tree to get to the KITM(™?) microphone — and won! — for a crazy start to a not so crazy show. Greg Dworkin says that whether you believe in sanity this time of the year or not, these holidays are becoming happier, saner and more cheerfully, boringly, Trump-free each day.
Donald is still out there, but he’s mostly Republican’s problem now. The news can, and should, turn away. (And they will, because the money’s going away.) Sure, ‘tis the season for unity, and all that, but let’s not go crazy! Red-states and counties do love to see blue-state presents under their tree, but they’re showing up strangely empty-handed right when their arms should be full.
More sanity: Americans are growing less reluctant to take a COVID-19 vaccine. Congressional negotiators might get a coronavirus rescue package by taking out the crazy bits. It’s an early Christmas for some Black colleges and universities, as MacKenzie Scott shows Ex Jeff Bezos how it’s done.
Yet, there is still insanity: Lunatics put Republicans into their positions, and unsurprisingly, might come and take them out. A Qanon-Republican (Is there any other kind?) was arrested for child pornography, and should be checked for adrenochrome levels. A former cop/paid vigilante in Texas almost kills an air-conditioner repairman in order to feed his delusions and bank account. Then, of course, there is the King of Cranks, crushing the CDC, destroying CDC records on coronavirus, all while having information suppressed in Florida. No wonder his future neighbors don’t want him in their backyards.
Caregivers decide how to spread the still too rare vaccine ethically, while Donald Trump rushes through lethal injection drugs, and slow-walks Regeneron. Thousands will die tonight, and tomorrow, and the days following. Trump lost the worst war we ever fought.
Tue, 15 December 2020
David Waldman delivers a most festive KITM today, full of Cha Nookah cheer:
Donald still has his share of fake believers. Steve Bannon says inauguration is just your constitutional opinion, man. Stephen Miller called for alternate electors to bring some alternate facts to the ground, and across the nation faithful fraudsters sporting Groucho glasses and forged certification “beat electors to the game”, thereby winning by default, of course… until the real electors showed up and ruined everything.
Even some Democrats need to be reminded that believing something should happen doesn’t necessarily make it happen. Jimmy Dore, best known for hosting The Jimmy Dore Show, and being an jerk/idiot, wants what he wants now, confusing having demands with having power. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez thinks two steps ahead and walks into fewer walls.
Mon, 14 December 2020
David Waldman’s College of KITM Knowledge is open, and class is in session.
Of course, neither Donald Trump nor his followers read the WSJ. Michigan votes today under the threat of violence. The entire electoral college is voting under the threat of violence. Proud Boys put on their mom’s skirts, but for safety’s sake might’ve put her knee pads on as well, when they went all stabby in DC last night. Really, it’s just a good idea to stay away from those assholes.
Keep in mind that there are still plenty of Republicans that did know better, that also tried to topple democracy. Newt Gingrich lost his dog whistle, and Ted Cruz can’t spell paradise, but they aren’t complete idiots and shouldn’t be treated as such. Even Rand Paul isn’t as dumb as Trump thinks he is. Trump’s judges didn’t save him because they aren’t Trump’s judges, and they have job security now. There are maybe 10 saps nationwide that really believe the election was stolen and even other Republicans laugh at them.
Dr. Greg Dworkin assures Joseph Epstein and Wall Street Journal that being a doctor isn’t just a guy thing, although there’s also bound to be some grumbling about incoming Senator Reverend Dr. Raphael Warnock for some reason, as well. If Georgian Republicans stay at each other’s throats Jon Ossoff could make it a sweep.
Fri, 11 December 2020
David Waldman delivers a new KITM, still available in all 50 states! (We still have 50 states, right?)
Joe Biden was elected President of the United States; Donald Trump is trying overthrow democracy to take that title. This is just another example of the polarization of politics… or actually sedition. Nope it doesn’t matter what side of the political divide you’re on. The new embrace of political polarization reveals the worst side of bothsideism-er-ists, as Trump Gimmetarians who don’t want to risk losing, especially when they know they deserve to lose, rig the system because they just know you would if you were them.
The Electoral College prepares to hand Donald Trump the loss he still refuses to accept. Trump continues to make perfect phone calls for those to join his lost cause, and the Kraken Caucus is right there to dead-end with him. Trump will lose for the umpteenth time, but maybe that’s not the point. For Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio, it’s business as usual, for others it’s a whole new career. Wisconsin might not be totally on the ball, but at least they aren’t getting mixed up in this.
Other countries have procedures in place to handle problems similar to this, but maybe we’re just too nice. We went and forgot the Alamo and let Santa Anna chew gum in exile on Staten Island. Mar-a-Lago has a new print of Donald Trump on the cover of Responsible Statecraft framed above the bar, waiting for Donald to make Palm Beach great again. Donald’s real and fake families do need a place to pretend to live, and who knows, maybe Melania might visit… and of course, folks like the Syrians need an address to send their check.
Thu, 10 December 2020
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin are back together again! Ok, it hasn’t been that long, but it’s always good news when it happens!
Good news also for those who disagree with how another state handles electoral votes, COVID-19, gun laws, abortion, same sex marriage, etc. — Just have your state sue their state! There was a time states just didn’t care for that, supposedly. Now it turns out, some states, like Georgia, are maybe into that sort of thing. C'est la vie! Except, of course, for the officials who toss out their state’s electoral votes because they fear for their lives. Plenty of loons are standing by for that word from Donald Trump, or maybe their pet dog, to start boogin’. Sleeper cells are waking up in Congress as we speak. Mitt Romney senses that it’s time to act alarmed again.
Ah, but someday, like a miracle, Donald will disappear. Well, maybe not quite a miracle. But before he does, Joe Biden should stay out of the way of the authorities that do want to see Trump for moment or two. Until then, friends of Trump are friends with benefits. Michael Flynn’s pardon doesn’t make him innocent, but he’s still pardoned. David Perdue picked up $1.8 million from a guy, after he passed that guy’s bill. Trump installed a friend in the Pentagon who immediately sent all the money to a friend of both of theirs.
Nobody hates people getting benefits more than the guy that just missed qualifying for them. This is what’s called “economic anxiety”… which also includes being anxious about any people of color, whatever their actual class.
South Dakota Governor Kristi Noem notes that COVID-19 isn’t so bad if you don’t have it, and those that do, grease the wheels of progress. Over 3,000 went into the gears last night. Sweden thought this was a good plan too, for a while. RonaRudyTooty finds no downside with this system.
Wed, 9 December 2020
Wednesday may be Sundae at Carvel, but it’s Law Day at KITM.
First, a little more on that 1,500-lawyer open letter that Joan told us about yesterday, just to set the stage for another story about lawyers protesting. This time, it’s a protest of Florida Man governor Ron DeSantis sending the cops to raid the home of former state data scientist Rebekah Jones, in what Jones says is a foundationally-shaky retaliation for exposure of DeSantis’s demands for supporting his preferred COVID lies.
BREAKING NEWS: Something, something, Donald Trump, aliens, and the former head of the Israeli space agency you never knew existed.
Safe Harbor Day has come and gone, but Trump’s (or not-Trump’s, depending) courthouse shenanigans continue, despite still more increasingly-decisive setbacks, and even as the “Elite Strike Force” is felled by the COVID strike force. Florida Man attorney Armando joins us for a generalized thrashing of what passes for the Trump “plan” of attack, featuring 100% more law! In a late-breaking but unsurprising development, Trump’s pounding of the table rings false, too.
With Trump’s chances to stall or reverse state certifications behind us, what problems might still lie ahead? For one thing, there’s the long-term damage to the credibility of our system, facilitated even by “decent Republicans.” But beyond that, there’s still the January 6th Joint Session, where Congress counts and ratifies the Electoral College vote. We know that a couple Members widely regarded as kooks plan to try to muck up the works. But what about the vaunted “institutionalists?” Well, no. They look like they’re all in, too.
Tue, 8 December 2020
It wouldn’t be a Tuesday KITM without Joan McCarter! Or, without David Waldman, of course! (Who would answer the phone when she called in?)
Wasn’t today the day Donald Trump was supposed to shut up about the election? Was it next Monday? Three Wednesdays from next? For now, the coup continues. Donald has a favor to ask of the Pennsylvania House Speaker, though. Trump called him twice, in case he’s hard of hearing. That’s the third state he’s personally leaned on, that we know of. “We” doesn’t necessarily include Donald Trump, because who knows on what level Donald “knows” anything at this point. “Coup”, however, is not an overstatement. Anyone who thinks it is, doesn’t know the meanings of the term.
Kool Aid drinker Lou Dobbs confronted Kool Aid vendor Stephen Miller about Republican coup dawdling. Texas won’t secede until they first use the Supreme Court to sue enemy states. (Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton is playing a little Trump-dimensional chess here.)
Just put Ken Paxton on Donald Trump’s Christmas pardon list. Donald has so many pardons planned, he might put together a “form letter” pardon or possibly more of a “Mad Libs” pardon for Rona-Rudy-Tooty-Jack A’roony-Giuliani. 1,500 attorneys are calling for bar associations across the country to investigate members of Trump's "elite strike force". Rudy and Jenna Ellis plan to fight them all the way to the highest traffic court. Jenna just discovered one more reason not to sit near Rudy Giuliani. We here at KITM wish this monster well, along with her friends and family. Unless, one of them is Mitch McConnell. McConnell can bite a big COVID-19 and chew it.
Mitch McConnell still holds COVID-19 relief hostage, and maybe some Senate Democrats are going to cave in. Mitch protects Postmaster Jerk Louis DeJoy as well. If we get Georgia, we can fix all of this and more.
Mon, 7 December 2020
Have an introspective Pearl Harbor day. Did you know that more people will die from Covid-19 today, than died at Pearl Harbor in 1941? Kind of a pain in the ass to have to consider that, isn't it? Tomorrow is “Safe Harbor” day, which who knows, might mean something this year.
Georgia has recounted, and Brian Kemp is reannouncing the recertification of presidential election results. (Joe wins.) Will there be more phony-baloney lawsuits? Sure, but they’ll be thrown out even quicker. Based on their Georgia Senate debates, Jon Ossoff and Raphael Warnock win by default.
Donald Trump is disappearing, like a miracle. He is falling off the front page, and as you know, Donald hates that. Sure, it will take a long time to get the stink out, but even if Trump hang-glided off Air Force One into Mar-a-Lago, come Inauguration Day he won’t be president. Some scary violent nutballs and fascists will stick around, but actually smart Republicans and Democrats will only want to see Donald Trump again in court.
At the moment, the places that really need airing out are the ones Rona-Rudy Giuliani was sitting in. Open the windows, please! Something just doesn’t smell right with Trump’s lawyer Jenna Ellis, either.
Here come the Covid-19 vaccines! Rest assured, however, that wherever you are in the line, you ain’t in the front. There aren’t much vaccines yet to go around either, so take it easy on the featherheads that still won’t put on masks. After all, if we outlaw mask non-compliance, only outlaws won’t wear masks. And yet, you could look at swiss cheese and find a better solution to Covid-19 than Swedish government has come up with until now.
Fri, 4 December 2020
David Waldman delivers the Friday KITM... Yay, it’s Friday! Joe Biden just might be making weekends great again. Notice how they have been becoming a little less dreadful lately? Donald Trump is falling off the front page… although his stain will persist for a long time.
Oh, Donald is still out there. But, he’s squeezed the last pennies from the rubes, the Republican lampreys are detaching, Trump’s left out there punching himself in the face, and losing. It’s his word against his now, and no one is listening.
A few dead-end swindlers remain to snuffle up the dregs. Alleged onanist-flatulist Rudy Giuliani couldn’t even mortify himself into the spotlight in Michigan once ultra-wack job Mellissa Carone took the stage. Who should play Carone on Saturday Night Live? Cut her a check, and she’ll be there, herself. Cut enough checks and SNL won’t need a cast.
This doesn’t mean fraud has left politics. The Florida attorney that gave seminars on fraud-voting in Georgia didn’t come up with the idea, you know. Josh Hawley, still paving the way for Trump lies, pretends to live at his sisters place when he needs to vote out of state.
Third or fourth time’s the charm for Mariannette Miller-Meeks, winning by 1.1 handfuls of a vote over Rita Hart, which would have gone the other way if Iowa counted votes like other states.
Democrats pick Rosa DeLauro to be the next House Appropriations Committee chairwoman, although fundraising performance might have pointed to Debbie Wasserman Schultz. Don’t worry, as long as Debbie’s money sticks around, so will she. Sean Patrick Maloney takes over the DCCC and is ready for a fight, which will be what he is going to recieve.
China’s Sinovac tried to Sinobribe its Coronavac into approval. Pass on that one.
Adolf Hitler Uunona wins election in Namibia, but has no plans to move on to world domination during his first term. His name wasn’t much of a hindrance there as Namibians aren’t bothered so much about that particular era in German history.
Thu, 3 December 2020
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin do dumps, big massive dumps of insight and entertainment for Thursday’s show:
What’s worse, Donald Trump or COVID-19? It could be a tie, they are hard to separate at this point.
We lost a 9/11’s worth of people to COVID-19 yesterday. A total number rivaling a nuclear strike. About 70,000 since Donald Trump invented regeneron. So yesterday, instead of doing something, or anything, Donald spent the whole day producing his “most important speech” ever, worth even less than absolutely nothing, a net negative to everyone.
In fact, if we want to reach proper immunisation levels across the country we should make an effort to “depoliticize” vaccinations, maybe we can call the vaccine “The Trump vaccine”, and praise Donald Trump as often as possible, so that he doesn’t become distracted or counterproductive. Of course, those people who didn’t bother to wear masks, or actively opposed them in bars, restaurants, parties, orgies, rallies, protests, private and superspreader events... From those that think COVID-19 is a hoax, to those that just don’t think... They created, and reside in, hot zones and should be moved to the front of the vaccine line, right behind the important people. Sigh.
You don’t need to tell Republicans they lost the election, they know. Most of them are in it to troll the libs as long as they can. Some really could be that dumb or crazy, though. That concerns the people that think this pro-wrestling schtick might have just gone too far. Money, like Sheldon Adelson, and OG, like Newt Gingrich are beginning to sweat this hand as the lunatics line up, some of them dangerous for the party, and some of them ready to end the game for everybody. The folks that fantasize about martial law have been training cops on how they want them to handle it.
KITM listener-correspondent John Ronald has at least two first names, and a report on voter suppression in Harris county Texas. Over in Florida, a Republican holds a TED talk on how to fraudulently vote in Georgia. David Perdue cashes in on his job, 2596 times. Ivanka Trump can give her dad and bros inside tips on where to find cigs in the pen.
Wed, 2 December 2020
Joe Biden needs to get all of his ducks in a row, now. With Democrats, that means herding a lot of cats, a Nancy Pelosi specialty. David Waldman examines the process of arraying caucus constituencies in the steering and policy committee memberships. Whoever gets to steer will wield a lot of power, and there are a few theories of who will most deserve to take the wheel.
Greg Dworkin, temporarily distracted by fox news, calls in with a coronavirus update. Cases, hospitalisations, deaths, and heartbreak are due to take a leap this week. Coronavirus was in the US earlier than we thought. The CDC will shorten their recommended quarantine for COVID-19 exposure. Hang on, help is coming. Remember, to be safe always wear a mask!
Donald Trump mulls over handing out pardons to his eldest children and Uncle Rudy... probably Jared, not that goody two shoes Tiffany... and that wife he’ll need going into 2024. Other than that — Oh, who are we kidding? The dude’s a vending machine. Everyone has their price, and Donald’s is what you got on you. (Wait for his after Christmas sale, second week in January.)
Meanwhile, Trump will burn it all down before he gives Joe Biden a thing. He wants the Supreme Court to throw out somewhere between 80 thousand and 7 million votes, whatever it takes. Mike Flynn calls for a military coup. The White Tea Party Committee (WTPC) calls for martial law, civil war... and safe elections just like Ohio’s — except impeach Mike Dewine. Ron Johnson could say something, but it would be political suicide, perhaps the real kind, too. Of course, sticking with Trump is just as suicidal, and even more likely to kill bystanders. Kelly Loeffler cuts off her own avenue of escape. How many people does Trump have to kill before Twitter removes the tags from his tweets? If you join a Republican suicide pact, make certain you have a tight grip before jumping off that bridge.
Brad Parscale took every inch of Trump’s love, and should be thankful he got out when he did.
Tue, 1 December 2020
We made it to December! Only 24 more days until… Only 50 more days until the Inauguration of Joe Biden as the president of the United States! Ho ho ho!
David Waldman and Joan McCarter bring us some glad tidings early:
Joe Biden is packing many welcome stocking-stuffers into his bag, including a way-overdue COVID stimulus and executive order patches to build us back better. Democracy gets treats while Trumpers and their moles get the sack. It will be easy to cut Trump from intelligence briefings by just enforcing normal standards for trustworthiness.
This will all be easier with a couple of new Georgia Senators. Donald Trump called Georgia governor Brian Kemp to call off the runoff elections, or maybe all elections, because who needs them? Brian is going to get a new phone for Christmas. Donald’s getting nothing from Santa.
Donald Trump gave Michael Flynn the gift that keeps on giving, a preemptive pardon. Rudy the red-nosed wanker is first in line for what’s bound to be the hottest gift for Trumpers this year. Experts like Emptywheel are reading the fine print, and suggest some might be getting more than they hoped for.
One of Jared Kushner’s many awful gift ideas, Scott Atlas, prime example of the Trump Trollocracy, is now past his expiration date. More than the average troll, Scott helped kill hundreds of thousands while in his position and hundreds of thousands will die because of him in the future. The organizer of anti-COVID lockdown rallies in Pennsylvania got a COVID test prior to meeting with Donald Trump, and you know what that means.
Darwin H.M., @Darwin_Darko to you and me, describes why it is time to leave Afghanistan, before one more American is killed. Trump hopes to sell the United Arab Emirates billions of dollars worth of arms that they plan to regift soon.
Mon, 30 November 2020
It’s almost December? Why isn’t it almost January? David Waldman and Greg Dworkin distract us with facts, news and wisdom while we wait:
Come with me and you'll be... in a world of half imagination! Even Wonka couldn’t have handled as much fantasy as the Trump administration is handing out lately. 20+ days of Donald Trump and his supporters refusing to accept “You get nothing! You Lose! Good day sir!” In fact, America has been telling him that for about 2000 days, but he and his parasites are quite difficult to dislodge. Still, conspiracists might have bitten off more than they can chew in Georgia, because if they are to be believed, why vote? And, if they aren’t to be believed, why listen to them? Brian Kemp is giving Donald endorsement remorse but not much else.
Meanwhile, Don Jr. and Eric get free helicopter rides on Marine One in their new Uday-Qusay members only jackets for their last chance to infect the help on the taxpayer dime. COVID-19 continues to separate the deluded from the enlightened, with patients denying the horror as their caregivers relive it. Senator David Perdue saw a lot of people that wouldn’t be needing their money anymore.
Over on the thinking side of politics, there are some counterintuitive lessons. In Georgia’s runoffs, Jon Ossoff succeeds by embracing Bernie Sanders and Slutty Vegans. Chris Krebs explains to 60 Minutes how the election was made secure by prioritizing paper ballots. While the chances for something catastrophic happening to democracy are dropping, the chances for something stupid happening remain at 100%. Winning Georgia’s Senate seats will take us a long way towards a functioning government. David maps out the electoral process well into the political twilight zone.
Fri, 27 November 2020
Mmm — leftovers! Not here though. David Waldman and Armando deliver a piping fresh KITM right to your ears today. Don’t bother to get off the couch, just finish off that can of cranberry sauce and tub of Cool Whip, and tune in!
Diaper Don sat behind his widdle desk yesterday and had only widdle things to say. Hell yes, Donald Trump is “stepping down” for Joe Biden, of course, he’s not coming to the inauguration. We’ve had Trump’s number for some time now. He’ll continue to destroy the country of course, but that’s barely been a side interest for him. Real despotism is a lot of work. Pardoning people takes so little effort that he can work a couple in between holes.
The Right loves dead liberals. That’s because people actually respect dead liberals, plus you can have them say whatever you want. Almost as good, are fake ex-liberals, because you know they’re going where the grift is deepest and won’t get tripped up by any sticky ideology. Things will be fine, if you only remember to not give your money to them. A guy dropped $2.5 million on True the Vote Inc., which bought him “vague responses, platitudes, and empty promises” — exactly what he payed for. Hopefully, none of you paid for a Kraken, because the delivery date keeps getting pushed back, and release might not be so imminent.
Thu, 26 November 2020
Welcome to our annual KITM Thanksgiving Special, with your hosts, David Waldman and Greg Dworkin, and their special guests, the Loudoun County Rockettes! Brought to you by… you. We sure couldn’t have done it without you. We’re still grateful for you, even if your name might possibly be mispronounced by us. (David’s got “Nevada”, “Latiñes” and “Latines” down pat, now if only he could say “adversary”…)
There is a lot to be thankful for! 80,000,000 legal votes. 306 electoral votes. Over 30 transparently idiotic lawsuits, and counting. Several of the dumbest, craziest lawyers in the country. We should thank The Resistance, fighting from the last inauguration right up to this one. And, the few, proud, honest Republicans... Webcams on laptops, relaying LGBT bashers’ laptops to Zoom. And, John P. Flannery, the Robert Redford of Willy Wonkas, all out there, fighting the good fight.
Yesterday, the Trump Supreme Court and their new superspreader Justice put a big boot heel on both state’s rights, and public health by blocking New York’s coronavirus restrictions on houses of worship, formally trading “latte drinking Prius drivers” with “wine drinking bicycle riders” in the Supreme Court lexicon.
Meanwhile, we die from a preventable disease. Idiocy remains popular in South Dakota. You can even lose your job if you aren’t one. West Virginia can’t keep up... in fact, they don’t really want to. Perhaps, if we only had more self-destructive door-knockers, we’d have more Democrats in Congress.
Wed, 25 November 2020
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin are in for a pre-Thanksgiving KITM, and just so you don’t miss them, they’ll be back for Thanksgiving too!
Today, Donald Trump will reveal election blockbuster news in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania at… psych! Donald’s currently pantsless watching TV, unwilling to even assist his loyal stooges in destroying America.
President-elect Joe Biden is president. Trump has been in absentia since he started. The election wasn’t close, but it was a nail-biter for democracy for a while. The election proves Republicans don’t care about America, or they only care about the America who voted for them, who pretty much hate America. The Republican officials that saved the country were heretics and apostates that prefer facts and truth and democracy and integrity over party. They will be dealt with accordingly. For your weekend reading (Sure, it is Wednesday, but it will take you till Monday to read all of it.) check out the essential and extensive inside story Michigan’s fake voter fraud scandal. Of course, this won’t be the end of it. Mostly Black, urban areas like Detroit will have to keep on fighting.
The transition delay is going to cost lives. Nearly a sixth of the Senate Republican caucus has tested positive for coronavirus, as none of them are smart enough to wear a mask, and watching Hannity makes them more stupid every day.
History will demand to know why we didn’t put Donald Trump in front of a firing squad. Donald Trump would want a state funeral and burial at Arlington Cemetery if only for the reason that they’d be taxpayer funded, and an eternal grift.
Jared and Ivanka pulled their 3 kids from a DC Jewish school, and you can be sure the school had a cake that day to celebrate. Unfortunately, that means Javanka had to go somewhere else, and there goes that neighborhood.
Meanwhile, Republicans quietly plot to sink Biden nominees. Steven Mnuchin will put $455 billion where Janet Yellen can’t get to it. Fraudster John Lott has has quickly slid into the Justice Department. The Office of Management and Budget gets Schedule F’ed. Trump unlocks the backdoor for Russia and throws away the key.
Tue, 24 November 2020
Get in. David Waldman takes the wheel and drives us another 2 hours away from the last 4 years.
Today, Trump will pardon the national Thanksgiving turkey. On January 20, he’ll be dragged, kicking and screaming, sadly metaphorically, from the White House. In between, it will just be the usual bitter, corrupt bs that fewer and fewer should pay attention to. Except prosecutors. They need to listen up.
Unfortunately, objects like Donald are always closer than they appear. From now on, even landslide election wins will be challenged. Pennsylvania Republicans voted against certification of a county that Trump won by 22,000 votes. Misinformation superspreaders, White-power terrorists and Dimwit Republicans have more power than ever, and all of them are armed. Back in the day, Senators didn’t need a gun to win an argument, when a cane would do. Of course, guns always do it more efficiently and from a distance.
How much more real can COVID-19 get? In all 50 states deaths are higher than normal. Sturgis-borne coronavirus has spread like locusts back out to the coasts. Correspondent Brian Munroe and Dan Rather try to bring perspective to the plague.
Mon, 23 November 2020
Donald Trump isn’t quite gone, but little by little, he is going. You can feel the weight slowly lifting. KITM can now tackle “Flea bites Johnny Rotten’s penis” stories, and finally take the time to consider Flea’s perspective…
Sidney Powell’s leopard print camouflaged her so well that the Trump team didn’t notice her prowling their stages and tweets. The Kraken isn’t under the bus yet, though. She’s just more of a freelance lunatic now.
No, you do not have to feel the Trump voter's pain. They aren’t here to feel yours. Mitch McConnell isn’t going to see it Joe Biden’s way. Republicans said Donald Trump shouldn’t be impeached, because it would hurt our government, but Republicans always make certain that governance doesn’t work, because that is what their voters expect from their world. GSA Emily Murphy isn’t interested in making government function, because she understands that wasn’t the job she was hired for. Republican senators hate Donald Trump, but dislike a functioning process even more.
For people like that, there is jail. The Michigan attorney general is looking into criminal probes of state and local officials. Would prosecuting Donald Trump restore the rule of law? It couldn’t hurt.
A newspaper photographer was chased from a boys baseball game in Arizona for being “fake news”. Meanwhile, there are no more ICU beds available in Arizona. A record 83,870 people are currently hospitalized with COVID-19, while half the US is stuck in 1919. We need more war correspondents reporting from the COVID-19 front lines. Put on your mask and hang on, help is coming.
Fri, 20 November 2020
David Waldman was almost “too busy” to bring us a new KITM for today! Can you imagine? There is so much to talk about, and who knows how much time left to talk about it.
Things are so insane, David had to release the Kraken, or as we call him, Armando, to help fathom the fusillade of facts and falsehoods flooding the… (I can only think of F-words to describe this situation.)
Joe Biden was elected president. Georgia calls it, again, for Joe. Probably. Michigan probably will certify their state. But, wait, there goes Senator Mike Shirkey and Representative Lee Chatfield to have a chat with Donald at the White House, which would seem ill-advised... unless they planned to overturn the election, subvert democracy, establish a fascist coup d'état, maybe? In reaction, non-coup Republicans have become stern. Democrats, even sterner. AOC’s out there fighting… a different war. Militiamen prepare for a high body count.
Donald Trump is leaving within two months, probably. David and Armando discuss the norms, laws, codes, procedures and penumbral reasoning soon to flushed down the commode, unless people prove they really value those sort of things, and call Trump’s bluff.
Thu, 19 November 2020
How do you write a summary of a wildfire? Is democracy burning down, or is the threat being contained? There are so many fires, and so many arsonists! Here’s where David Waldman and Greg Dworkin were this AM:
The Board of Canvassers in Wayne County, Michigan almost didn’t certify the county’s votes, because of the two certifiable racists who derailed the process, then viral fame ensued. Finally, the two chose to be a footnote, rather than a chapter in future history books, and voted with the others to certify the vote. Donald Trump then called on the two to reach out and tell them what a great job... and life they had to that point, and what a shame it would be if something happened to it. Both now have signed paperwork indicating that they didn’t approve of the votes they had already made. But… of course, they already certified, the process has moved on, the laws the law… the gavel has dropped… right? RIGHT?
Well, one gavel dropped, which used to mean something, but in this particular nightmare there’s a gavel gauntlet waiting, and one or two or five gavels could make trouble. Trump’s team is trying to light too many fires to put out. If the election had been just a little closer it would have been all ashes already.
The Georgia recount won’t shut Trump up. Donald and his team will just get funnier and more dangerous each hour. You know what we should do? We should reach out to Trump supporters, look forward, not back, and let Trump be Trump... legally. Or, not. GSA Emily Murphy might be trying to avoid jail herself, or perhaps she is truly internally struggling in personal anguish, and just wants to be a good soldier... Republicans can’t fight Joe Biden if they have to admit he exists.
Maybe there’s some nuance in politics, and a few conservatives left that might still be communicated with. The ones that don’t watch Fox, and haven’t started watching OANN. The ones that don’t bet on how many of their employees catch COVID-19, or use stimulus money to buy guns. The ones still alive after refusing to wear masks.
Meanwhile, let’s make a note to look into Latiñes concerns, before or if we have another election.
Wed, 18 November 2020
Ever wonder how many times the actions of a few people managed to save us from destruction? Or how many of these situations might occur in, say, the next 60 days? Did you ever think you’d be watching one unfold on Zoom? Trump forces are dropping bombs everywhere, so no matter how ineptly assembled, you should expect some to explode. Democracy almost lost Michigan yesterday when two Wayne County board members decided to not certify their counts. They were forced into retreat even before their Confederate monuments could be built. Things can go back to normal, at least there, at least for now.
In Pennsylvania, they get Rudy Giuliani. Not the best choice, even if you are just planning to drive the case to the Supreme Court. Rudy is charging $20,000 a day, not including his per diem. To think that Donald Trump could’ve went with Scott Baio for Cameo money! Giuliani did spring his alleged lover’s daughter on insurance fraud charges, let’s see Scott try that.
Another guy in search of a few okay lawyers would be Lindsey Graham. The Secretary of the State of Arizona shut down his alibi immediately. Donald Trump’s voter suppression efforts seem to have suppressed Republican votes in Georgia’s presidential election and hopefully, in their Senate runoffs.
All of this is kind of funny, until people die because of it. Most people do blame Trump, unless they are Trump people, and only half of them do. If you wanted to know what’s really going on, you could always ask Christopher Krebs, but today he’s dropping off his resume at Joe Biden headquarters. For now, you will need to ask GSA Administrator Emily Murphy to explain things.
Tue, 17 November 2020
Hmm-Lliiiiiivvvve! David Waldman welcomes KITM’s regular, yet special, Tuesday guest Joan McCarter to discuss the important things happening and not happening today.
Donald Trump, who was never really president, but is now somehow in exile, is plotting his return. About 3000 votes have turned up in Georgia, almost 1000 in the Trump Glorious Victory column. Only several million more to go! Rather than dig up Trump votes, Lindsey Graham realized it would be easier and quicker to just not count Biden votes. So, he rung up Georgia’s secretary of state, and Arizona’s, and Nevada’s to see if any might be able to work in a few felonies into their counts.
Trump’s lawyers also turned out to be slackers when it came to going to jail for their client. Donald knew who he should turn to in times like these, but Rudy Giuliani was available, so he’s got the job. It’s been a while, but Rudy still has a few tricks up his sleeve!
Joe Biden has put together a White House senior staff short on his kids, their in-laws, or even their girlfriends. Donald Trump is still blocking the lot of them. Congress has less than two weeks to keep government funded, or provide COVID-19 relief. Meanwhile, House Democrats will elect most of their leadership team this week. David can give you a tip on how to guess the outcome of these things, although it’s less effective for Republicans.
The toppling of Confederate statues in Portsmouth Virginia led to political retaliation by the police against a state senator and several local Black leaders. So far, the police chief has been fired and the charges dropped.
Mon, 16 November 2020
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin don’t have to explain that to you. Now, how do we clue in the other folks?
The Q Cucks Klan marched on Washington without masks, just as neuroradiologist Scott Atlas called for an uprising against Gretchen Whitmer, who recently escaped from their kidnapping and murder plot. Scott was misunderstood/stupid beyond belief, and even worse, from the Hoover Institute. Candace Owens showed she understands Republican priorities.
Hospitals are in hell. The coronavirus is now a rural and red state threat. Try telling that to people who will die before admitting that they caught Covid. We have a chance to stop this horror/shit show with outreach and messaging… and science! For instance, If it wasn’t for Donald Trump infecting so many Americans, the world wouldn’t have these latest vaccines! Remember that, great “historians”! Ferrets rejoice!
Ignorance and idiocy will continue to grow, because it is so easy to understand and implement selfishness and laziness. Still, there is hope. Mitch McConnell doesn’t run the whole show, and there are methods around his madness. It also turns out that people don’t approve of police riots, and everyone is pretty embarrassed about the electoral college.
Fri, 13 November 2020
Soon, we won’t have Donald Trump to kick around, anymore. Geraldo Rivera says it’s time for Trump to walk away with “grace and dignity.” Easier said than done for Donald. His crazy train has never been on the rails. Don’t be concerned, there’s plenty of nitwits and bozos coming up the ranks to occupy David Waldman each day.
Jonathan Turley used to play a smart guy on TV, but dropped that gig a few years ago. Now he’s Donald Trump’s idea of a smart guy, affecting gravitas on Donald’s all cap tweets about Dominion Voting Systems stealing his votes. You know you’ve hit bottom when you’re being “Well, actually”-ed by Steve Doocy on Fox & Friends. Even extremely progressive blogs aren’t that crazy, lately.
Democrats can fix things... or try to throttle each other into disarray as if power was a finite resource that deplenishes when shared. Power and money, when invested wisely, demonstrates leadership and strength.
Thu, 12 November 2020
Winner, winner, chicken dinner! Joe Biden won! We might as well keep celebrating, as here it is, almost the middle of November, and there are still people just figuring this out. Some Trump followers are coming to grips with reality. Some are following the advice of their chickens and are moving on.
Karl Rove understands the election won’t be overturned. Trump evangelical Robert Jeffress calls Joe Biden “president-elect”. Hugh Hewitt will not only tell you Biden’s the one, but he approves of Joe’s Chief of Staff pick, Ronald Klain. Oklahoma Republican Senator James Lankford says he will fight for Biden’s right to intelligence briefings. Even British Prime Minister Boris Johnson calls Donald Trump America's “previous president”.
No chicken could be as dumb as a focus group undecided voter. Still — a vote is a vote. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and Abigail Spanberger both found more votes than their Republican opponents, which is kind of how they won their elections.
The middle of November is also about the time presidents pardon turkeys… and felons. Lame-duck Donald might try to save his own neck from the chopping block. It’s not a good time to be a Trump lawyer. Snell & Wilmer withdraw from their election lawsuit in Maricopa County, Arizona. Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton’s goose might be cooked. James O’Keefe’s stool pigeons find GoFundMe isn’t chicken feed.
Donald Trump’s next target to destroy is Fox News, but generally Donald needs to own a business to destroy it.
The COVID-19 pandemic topped 140,000 cases yesterday, it will continue to become more horrible until the Biden administration can take over, and even then there will be heckling from the sidelines. There is no place to hide, and no “miracle cure”… inoculating against coronavirus is only one of the technological, logistical, and societal hurdles to come.
Wed, 11 November 2020
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin welcome back Denise Oliver Velez, whose inestimable breadth and depth of experience, activism and legacy in racial, cultural and political affairs can illuminate our way out of Donald Trump’s morass.
Today’s principal topic however, and probably the principal topic for America’s foreseeable future, is the Latiñe voting bloc, which can’t be reached with just a few spanish words, and is far from a single voting bloc, with regional, class, religious and racial differences driving their lives and their votes. Trump got out the Hispanic vote across the country by not taking them or their needs for granted.
Nonetheless, Joe Biden won the presidency. Yes, indeed. It’s a slow-motion beat-down, folks. The biggest win for a challenger since FDR. In addition, a team of international observers found no systemic fraud in U.S. elections. The New York Times found no fraud. The AP says there’s no widespread fraud. There is nothing to see here... And, that is why Georgia is going to hand recount all of the votes — to build trust and respect (and watch Donald Trump lose twice).
Tue, 10 November 2020
Tuesday! David Waldman! Joan McCarter! Whoo hoo! That’s the good news… then again:
Maybe Donald isn’t going away.
Donald Trump’s presidency — his entire life — has turned on people believing that absolutely nobody could be that stupid, venal and lazy, and yet here he is proving it, day after day, decade after decade, never paying up. Today he will do everything stupidly wrong, tomorrow he will be back, and worse. Trump is completely ineffectual, and 100% destructive. The more you think about it, the dumber things become. If Joe ever gets in, he’s going to be in so much trouble for the last four years.
Trump’s “last, desperate, laughably weak” attack on Obamacare goes to the Supreme Court this week, and the only people due to suffer will be the ones that need insurance. Mitch McConnell’s cold blue hands squeeze the last breaths out of Covid relief.
Mon, 9 November 2020
Believe it or not, there are some that aren’t taking the news so well. Rudy’s still got a few tricks up his sleeve, and out in the alley. Don Jr., always a great judge of character, believes something is awry. Mike Pence pops up for air and to honor Donald Trump’s invention of Pfizer’s Coronavirus vaccine. Today is the day Joe Biden became President, and Donald Trump should be in nobody’s backyard.
Greg Dworkin describes the beauty of RNA vaccines, and Messenger RNA, as science and expertise head back to the White House. Utah’s Governor finds today is a good day to issue a mask mandate. Greg is also quite happy that dogs and sane people are heading back to the White House. There are plenty of takeaways from the 2020 elections, and one is that we should be holding on to Democracy as tight as Trump holds a flag. It wasn’t a close election, and it is becoming less close the more ballots are counted.
Will Donald Trump, you know... pivot to a Biden post-election transition process? That might be a bit much to ask from the crew that couldn’t Google the correct Four Seasons, but David would be happy to walk them through the handbook if need be.
Fri, 6 November 2020
David Waldman brings us our KITM on the day we’ve all been waiting for: Day One of Donald Trump in exile.
Donald Trump did throw together a victory speech for last night. If you didn’t catch it, there will be a lot more to come. Newt Gingrich demands arrests. Seb Gorka demands storm troopers. Steve Bannon moves toward Games of Thrones solutions (Twitter puts his head on a pike.) Brooks Brothers rioters — except this time heavily armed — head into battleground states. Your puny logic, norms, and laws will be no match for them.
The Secret Service ramps up their protection around Joe Biden.
Meanwhile, Rick Santorum looked nauseous last night on CNN. Just spit it out Santorum! Chew some gum, you’ll feel better! Rick promised on the air that Republicans wouldn’t try anything crazy... like appointing electors to steal the election. Rick speaks for all Republicans, even the lying ones, so that’s that.
The Democrats have won, and as per tradition, their accusations and finger-pointing can now commence. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez will not be made a scapegoat, and instead demands credit. That’s no way to get ahead!
Thu, 5 November 2020
David Waldman welcomes Greg Dworkin, and you to the KITM Almost, but Not Quite 270 Electoral Votes Special.
Donald Trump is still president. Donald’s lawyers and lackies hereby demand the immediate ceasing & continuance of ballot counting. Republicans have come out in support of whatever that is and join in demanding more & less. William Barr might send armed agents to guarantee it happens or stops. It’s right there in the Constitution! Well, it’s somewhere — do your research! The Postal Service will do what it can to slow things down. Someone has to pay, but Louis DeJoy might dash on that bill.
Don’t try to escape, no one will take us.
Democrats know deep down that this is all their fault. Republicans might have trouble winning the popular vote, or governing, but with such a
Wed, 4 November 2020
David Waldman and Greg Dworkin felt it with the rest of us last night, and are here to help get us back on our feet and ready to fight.
Trusted polling authorities will be spending today explaining why people would ever trust them as authorities again, but really, is there vote tampering? Or maybe… possibly... vote tampering? Or maybe, gratification and democracy just are not that instantaneous. David’s own Loudoun county was very red and very blue at times last night.
There is still a lot to count. 300,000 mail ballots were shown as not delivered so a federal judge ordered U.S. Postal Service inspectors to sweep postal facilities. Louis DeJoy told the judge no thank you. A Milwaukee election official was given a police escort to turn in her absentee ballot info.
There is probably good news in Wisconsin, Michigan, Pennsylvania… probably. In fact, there is plenty of good news already. All four members of "the Squad" won easily. Cori Bush became the first black Congresswoman In Missouri history. And Joe Biden broke the record for the most votes ever received by a candidate at a US Presidential Election. Okay, after that there isn’t that much good news to count. Mitch McConnell, no MLK Jr., is back. Lindsey Graham is back. Susan Collins is back. Devin Nunes is back. Even a Republican that died from COVID-19 in October was elected. Democrats are in.. well, you know.
Tue, 3 November 2020
The question on this nation’s minds: Could this possibly be the last Taco Tuesday for this administration?
David Waldman brings on Armando and Joan McCarter to prepare us for today. Listen to them, and you’ll be set. Take a nap until tonight when the action starts.
Battlelines have been drawn. Well, some sure are behaving like a war is coming. Nancy Pelosi is assembling her troops and is ready for anything. Meanwhile, Donald Trump fortified his bunker and has stowed away both Eva and Melania, clearly expecting the worst.
The Trump army of poll-watchers, constipated, paranoid, and... well, they were prepared to Karen up the joint until they found out there was no artillery backup and they still had to wear masks. It’s just no fun being a Trump goon if there’s so many rules to follow.
Frivolous lawsuits are being thrown out left and right, and are tossed right back in again, to then be thrown out again. Of course, all you need is a frivolous judge or two, and as Armando says, their “intervention can be determinative”.
Voters of color will have to work harder to have their ballots count, but when has not been the case? This time however, the military vote is in danger of going Democratic, and so Republicans are taking it out. As for you, stay in line, wear a mask, and protect your vote!
Mon, 2 November 2020
This could end up being a pretty hectic, vexing week. David Waldman and Greg Dworkin present our KITM moment of zen.
If you want to understand 2020, look to 2008, or maybe 1980 or 1932. Just cut it out with those comparisons to 2016. Joe Biden, as always, is ahead nationally, and in swing states, and all over the crosstabs, including Latinos. He has a big lead, people. There’s no such thing as a shy Trump voter. (You can look to their wives and daughters for the shy Biden vote.) In Nevada, Biden’s blue tide raises all votes. If you were to predict a winner, you might in fact say it would be Joe Biden. Donald Trump assures everyone that the polls are fake and he will win, therefore Donald Trump also predicts a Biden win.
Donald Trump is building the wall! The third one, this time unscalable, around the White House. You’d think that would hold Trump until the cops come, but unfortunately Donald still has that helicopter. (He’s just the villain to be prying aide’s fingers off the landing gear as it ascends, too.)
Republicans salt the earth in their retreat, first attacking voting, soon attacking voters. Two judges in Minnesota issued a voting rules order that contradicts the instructions mailed with the ballot. in Texas, Republicans are trying to throw out 100,000+ votes cast at drive-in voting centers that they helped design. In Pennsylvania, Republicans might only need to stall to win. Voting goons are fanning out across battleground states to coerce the vote and case out the polling areas and machines. Expect plenty of post-election goons fanning out as well, with police and party support.
Police took a Black toddler from his family’s SUV. Then, the union used his photo as propaganda.
Fri, 30 October 2020
Did you think that David Waldman would let you go KITM-free, less than 3 and a half days before this election? Are you kidding? David recorded today’s show before — and after his operation yesterday! It took three orderlies to pry the microphone out of his hands.
All this means that Ian Reifowitz can’t make his usual Friday visit. (Don’t let that dissuade your purchase of another copy of The Tribalization of Politics: How Rush Limbaugh's Race-Baiting Rhetoric on the Obama Presidency Paved the Way for Trump... Do it.) If Ian was here, do you know what he’d say? He’d say that Donald Trump hasn’t protected pre-existing conditions, and he can’t do it in the future without the Affordable Care Act… not that Trump ever planned to, to begin with.
Personally, I hope Amy McGrath kicks Mitch McConnell into that coal lobbyist position he’s been vying for, for decades. If not, Ian has a plan for Democrats to shove McConnell’s own words on Amy Coney Barrett down his throat. That works too.
Craig McLean was the acting head of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, until he wondered out loud if NOAA officials would behave with integrity. Unfortunately for him, and the rest of us, NOAA officials are Trump stooges.
Is Jared Kushner Trump’s stooge, or visa-versa? No stooge has ever been as privileged, self-entitled, or dangerous as Jared. David was sure his mind couldn’t be more numbed, until he read the transcript of Jared bragging how doctors and scientists were cut out of coronavirus decisions, about 300,000 deaths ago.
Thu, 29 October 2020
David Waldman is out today and tomorrow, and that’s okay. It’s okay because it would be awfully hard to resist vexing ourselves counting chickens that just might be a long way from hatching right now, and it’s okay because David also recorded a BRAND NEW KITM for today!
Let’s talk about Donald Trump’s corruption. That’s an evergreen topic, not only in regards to Donald, but for Republicans in general, many of whom have figured in his schemes before he was elected, and will somehow be carrying on long after he has gone.
“If you don’t give back, you’re never ever going to be fulfilled in life”, as some hack Trump had ghostwrite once said. As for Donald, what’s philanthropy without an angle to grift? Any good deed needs to show a profit, or it isn’t good enough for Donald Trump.
Trump donated $10 million to his 2016 campaign, except it wasn’t a donation, and it wasn’t his money, although he eventually made it his money. This time, Donald isn’t donating, and yet is probably raking it in. Does Trump take his money to the Chinese laundry?
Remember when Trump was suing Omarosa Manigault Newman? That might not happen since Trump has been stiffing his own lawyers. Anyhow, he might not want to get Omarosa mad. She could have a sequel in the works.
Joe Biden will have his work cut out for him, but the first thing he will need to do is bring back intelligence to the White House.
Wed, 28 October 2020
David Waldman is live today! He’s live Thursday and Friday also, but the KITMs, full of brand-new goodness, will be recorded. You’ll love them just as much!
Greg Dworkin asks us to keep our hands and feet inside the Pollercoaster… but you know what? Let’s see those hands over your heads — this ride is getting fun! Joe Biden is locking down Michigan and Wisconsin and double digiting nationally. Gen Z/Millennials have doubled over 2016. Down ballot is looking rosy as well. Blue-rosy.
Trump’s Omaha fans, who apparently don’t believe in COVID, can now attest that global warming is also a hoax. Will Donald’s inept handling of the his own rally, potentially endangering his own voters, because he stiffed the bus company affect Donald Trump’s chance of reelection? It probably won’t help.
Less than a week away from the election and the “How Trump Can Win” articles are finally slipping under “How Trump Can Lose” articles. It still is pretty certain that if Trump loses, he won’t be a good loser, and neither will his supporters. We already know that though, and are prepared to deal with them… most of them. There is the chance Donald Trump could call for… well, violent insurrection and political assassination... as he is sometimes wont to do. Democratic Governor Gretchen Whitmer was targeted, as well as Republican Governor Mike DeWine. Boogs are conspiring with cop killers and Hamas to ignite civil war…
Tue, 27 October 2020
Amy Coney Barrett is a Supreme Court justice. Well, not yet. She’s Donald Trump’s, Mitch McConnell’s and Leonard Leo’s show pony with only a fake swearing in at the White House. Eventually, it will be true, and at that point she will be one of the five justices appointed by presidents that lost the popular vote. The senators that voted for her represent 15 million fewer Americans than the Democrats (Ok, and Susan Collins) that didn’t. In fact, Republican presidents have named 15 of 19 justices. Republicans pick “originalist” judges, in that they “originally” wanted certain outcomes and are now in a position to declare that was the outcome all along.
The Supreme Court shadow docket now has the power to come out of the shadows. They haven’t agreed with most people for over 50 years, but who’s to stop them now? They only need to listen to a couple of dissenters, and then dictate history to the other 330 million.
Mon, 26 October 2020
Ready for some tough answers? David Waldman and Greg Dworkin aren’t going anywhere, especially this close to the big day. Democrats do have a place to go — the polls, with almost half already voting. This isn’t 2016, people! Joe Biden has a whole new coalition. Texas will have a couple million more voters, more Democrats, and one third more unmarried women. Joe’s nailing down battleground states and closing off Donald Trump’s paths of escape.
Greg dares to suggest what many of us dare not consider… Gulp!... We might win. Of course the election isn’t over until Donald Trump’s gone. Joe and Kamala will have to play hardball against a party with few ties to reality and nothing to win for except their own existence. Donald can always go back to the consulting job he had back in… 2018. The rest, however, have their backs against the wall and nowhere to go. Intimidation tactics will become worse with desperation.
If you had to set up grandpa Donald’s twitter account, what would you give him for a password?
Fri, 23 October 2020
Only 10 more shopping days before the 2020 United States presidential election! Time to stock up on Ian Reifowitz’s The Tribalization of Politics: How Rush Limbaugh's Race-Baiting Rhetoric on the Obama Presidency Paved the Way for Trump. Ian is David Waldman’s guest on Friday KITMs through the election. (Or as long as we can get him!) Race and class are linked in America, so it makes sense for Democrats to create solutions that address both as a combined reality, to address Republican’s intention to divide and conquer.
Donald Trump, King of Israel, wishes he could’ve debated Moses last night, but had to settle for Joe Biden. Ian assures us that Trump is not making inroads with American Jewish voters, with the possible exception of some Orthodox Hasidic Jews. It’s not just the masks that take the curl out of their payot, it’s that Republican partisanship is becoming as expected of them as it is of evangelical Christians.
The debates are over. Donald Trump made the 12th hour pivot away from being carried away in a straightjacket, and just behaved more like an abuser that can’t get you alone right now. Oh, but don’t worry… He’s got plans. If Louis DeJoy and Amy Coney Barrett can’t save him, expect Donald Trump to salt the earth in his retreat. Trump has issued a sweeping order for career federal employees to lose civil service protections to take those that he says are the deep state and making them what everyone knows to be the swamp.
Thu, 22 October 2020
It’s 11 days, 12 hours, 12 minutes and 26 seconds until the election, give or take… Deep breaths! Why is it still so far away? Listen to today’s KITM with David Waldman and Thursday’s guest Greg Dworkin, and another two hours will fly by!
Indeed, the presidential campaign really ends in just a few hours at the conclusion of tonight’s debate. This is Donald Trump’s one last chance for that one grand pivot into presidential behavior. It’s also his last chance to be a real dick... Tormenting Joe Biden over Hunter is the very least he could do tonight. Joe is already set with his Supreme Court answer.
The polls can’t be cheering up Donald lately. Demographics is yet another aspect of reality not in his favor. Adjusting for race can spoil a pollster’s aim, but Greg always adjusts for windage, elevation and skewage.
Even with a loss, Donald Trump is set to torture us for 11 weeks following the election. He wouldn’t miss that for the world. Christopher Wray and William Barr do not bring joy to Trump and shouldn’t be expecting an invitation to Melania’s Christmas party. The FBI hasn’t found Russians behind the Hunter Biden laptop scheme… yet.
Qatar and the United Arab Emirates have been leaking emails to journalists with the help of Elliott Broidy, but with Broidy going away, what will they do? Expect a presidential pardon, as Elliott Broidy is the reason Donald Trump doesn’t have to wear condoms, and you can’t lose a wingman like that.
11 days, 10 hours, 30 minutes and 34 seconds...
Wed, 21 October 2020
David Waldman presents another Kagro in the Morning, with only 7 more to go before the election!
Greg Dworkin reminds us to wear a mask. Also, get out and vote while you still can. In the past couple of weeks about 10,000 families lost a loved one to COVID-19. All of them probably wish they could have received some of that miracle cure Donald Trump promised to hand out… probably even Melania. If only the dead and dying could just make up their minds on what cure they want! Donald is bored, and moves on.
Trump wants more rallies, maybe 5 a day, to remind those stupid saps of how much he hates seeing them. Ralliers undoubtedly feel the same way. After all, it isn’t love that brings them together, you know.
2020 is no time for roundtable punditry to discuss political theater, because Donald Trump has killed presidential showbiz forever. Trump did make a pitch for Bob Hope fans, now that he’s losing in the 100 and under demographic. (Bob wouldn’t have voted for him either.)
Millions upon millions already have voted, and Donald is losing bad where he won a little, which is not good… for him. Who knows what it will take to beat Trump, but even more of this would be really nice.
Louis DeJoy is attempting to keep Post Office shenanigans under wrap until the election.
Even the Proud Boys couldn’t be stupid enough to send email threats, could they?
Rudy’s been caught toobin’.
Tue, 20 October 2020
Yesterday it was reported that Jeffrey Toobin exhibited his boredom with a Zoom staff meeting, you know, like we all do… perhaps a bit more “literally” than most. In unrelated news, David Waldman has not set yet up the “exclusive video option” for KITM deluxe subscribers. You never know the benefits increased editorial freedoms might bring!
No, wait. Yes you do! Armando, yes Armando, returns for the first 3/4’s of the entire show! As in the past, the conversation was wide ranging, covering the polling experience in Florida, pre-election voting, LV vs RV polling (forget LV, everyone’s LV), the mail-in voter advantage… or not, and the methods and timing of vote counts in Florida and elsewhere. Texas will let you know about your rejected ballot some time during the following administration. A Kentucky postal worker forgot to sift through the mail he wasn’t delivering for ballots, and now he’s in trouble. Fox News frighten their viewers one voter at a time.
The U.S. Supreme Court declined to take up an emergency stay called for by Republicans, allowing Pennsylvania to count absentee ballots received as late as the Friday after Election Day, so long as they are postmarked by Nov. 3. The court allowed this by a 4-4 split, and we all know what that means. Amy Coney Barrett could be the only vote Donald Trump needs to buy this year, however, if she’s caught it could stymie her future handmaidenly endeavours. Even Joe Biden might be ready to pack the court after that.
If Amy Coney Barrett doesn’t come through, Donald Trump is going to have to shoot his way out of the White House, or at least he needs Bill Barr to cover him while he makes a break for it. History will prosecute those that didn’t prosecute Trump when they had a chance.
Mon, 19 October 2020
Hundreds of thousands of non-conforming individualists at the Sturgis rally followed each other off the coronavirus cliff, superspreading across some red states and leaving a tab for $12.2 billion for the rest of us. On his upcoming Fox Network flagship promotional tour… or possibly auditioning to be Alex Jones’ sidekick, Donald Trump sows Covid like a dipshit Johnny Appleseed. The U.S. records over 70,000 cases in one day for the first time since July, and Governors haven’t been clued into how they’ll distribute vaccines even when they do get one.
Dems are in array with each other, but also with Never Trumpers, Recently Not Trumpers, and Undecided, But Not Really Trumpers, leaving Kirstie Alley, maybe Matt “Rick” Gaetz and a few others. Joe Biden leads Trump like Hillary did, but a lot better. Donald is running out of battleground states to battle in. Trump is in trouble unless he can cure the pandemic and resuscitate 300,000 people in the next 14 days. Manufacturing Hunter Biden stories just won’t do it.
Fri, 16 October 2020
It’s Friday! That’s the day David Waldman welcomes coffee enhanced Ian Reifowitz, author of The Tribalization of Politics: How Rush Limbaugh's Race-Baiting Rhetoric on the Obama Presidency Paved the Way for Trump (Two new hardcover copies would make attractive bookends in your Reifowitz-themed library!)
Last night NBC essentially retweeted crazy Uncle Donald’s far-right, conspiratorial bull pellets which could only be palatable to his base. Ian explains why Biden is crushing Trump among women. Biden’s town hall is crushing Low T’s in ratings.
Donald Trump was warned repeatedly about Rudy Colludy Giuliani being utilized as a Russian stooge, but actually kind of liked that about him. The guy that handed the laptop off to Rudy can’t keep his stories straight, but did bring Seth Rich back into the lunatic conversation. The FBI is finally getting involved — to investigate the links to foreign agents. This does not bode well for Rudy. Has anything ever boded well for Rudy?
Get out the vote for Joe Biden and David will have more time to cover stories like the alleged trespassing, anti-semitic, sexting, death-threatening, booze-cookie eating news anchor/Guilfoyle doppelganger vs. the Mayor of Anchorage!