Aug 6, 2024
Breaking! Well, it was this morning… David Waldman reports that Kamala Harris picked Tim Walz as VP, as spell checks across the nation are informed that no, you don’t want to add a “t” there.
Now, the race is on to find something wrong with Tim. According to the Antichrist’s own mad-libbed fundraising email, Walz will unleash HELL ON EARTH, but mostly Tim seems like a really nice guy. Critics will point out Walz’s age, which is MONTHS older than Kamala, but for right now voters see only one old guy in the race.
Walz does have “big dad energy”, but Donald Trump is the weird sleazy racist dotard GOAT to beat. Big brave psychiatrists with tears in their eyes have told Trump that he’s a whackadoodle, a few even expressed their concerns about him to Nancy Pelosi.
Trump fans don't mind any of that. They just want to know why Donald isn’t man enough to debate Kamala. MAGA ralliers shook “You’re Fired!” signs at the last Trump rally, pretty soon they’ll be chanting “Lock Him Up!”
When is Clarence Thomas going to be locked up? His behaivor has Bob Menendez shaking his head. Alas, it is how the Founding Fathers wanted it. Fellow member of the Black Robe Gang, Neil Gorsuch, warns people away from his buddy. Unfortunately, Dick Durbin keeps a grip on that blue slip.
Far-right racists seem pretty easy to goad into rioting. Just wait and see what Russian-linked ‘news’ outlets have planned for America in January.