Tue, 9 November 2021
David Waldman and Joan McCarter save the day! Where would Tuesdays be without them?
It’s hard to both-sides Paul Gosar. He’s more unlikeable than even Marjorie Traitor Greene, and for good reason. Paul joins every American conservative in constant unending fantasies about Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Gosar's fantasies are no different than most, centered on anime and beheading. What is AOC to do, bring this to Kevin McCarthy? You don’t want to look into his mind, bud. Twitter fixed everything by placing a public interest notice on the tweet… Justice is also slowly inching towards the 16 year old pickup driver who rolled coal, then rolled over cyclists back in September. Reuters sleuthed out the Trumpers harassing election officials, by calling back their phones. Someone took pictures of Mike Pence temporarily realizing he was set up to die on January 6, before he was able sublimate that thought far away. Steve KG Bannon is still at large.
Meanwhile, there’s more January 6 committee subpoenas, to remind everyone of those we hated and almost forgot. Speaking of, Kellyanne Conway returns to remind everyone of how little she knew in the Trump administration. Kellyanne’s ignorance reaches way back, to refusing to understand institutionalized racism. (which remains as part of the institution to this day.)
Are Democrats too woke? Of course they are, as defined by the people who frame things like that as an insult. The demand for a new race-code among conservatives was palpable before Critical Race Theory came along. Glenn Youngkin wouldn’t have won without it… if he did win.
The House GQP is considering whether to strip committee assignments from Republicans who voted for infrastructure. Quick-thinking Rep. Nicole Malliotakis thanked Donald Trump for her decision. People like building back better. Smart Republicans don’t say that. A North Dakota representative will miss his anti-vaccine rally as he can’t decide which end to point at the toilet following his Ivermectin-Hydroxychloroquine smoothies. He should’ve followed the lead of the Illinois teacher who got vaccinated, so that she could safely fight against vaccines.
Joan calls in to celebrate the end of Infrastructure Weeks, and to instruct everyone to get back to work. Adding a debt ceiling to the BBB bill could fix both Joe Manchin and Mitch McConnell. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) and the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) could revert to Republican control, but zombie votes are out there, helping preserve the Democratic antitrust agenda.