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Kagro in the Morning


Apr 25, 2023

Today, David Waldman and the KITM staff celebrate not being fired or hired by Rupert Mudoch.

Hey, remember Tucker Carlson? Tuck was sort of a prep school Lou Dobbs or that villain in a teen movie who wears a Brooks Brothers sweater like a cape over his Lacrosse polo. Anyhow, Fox News fired Tucker on a Monday morning, in front of his crew, for maximum disrespect, like a mob hit that can’t go open casket. Not that his crew had that much respect for him, or vice versa. In fact, they’ve already forgotten him. Whatever reason Rupert chose to take out Carlson, it wasn’t the right one.

As Ace KITM Correspondent Rosalyn MacGregor has been telling us, (paraphrased) Ottawa County, Michigan has been cluster-FUBARed through a wingnut insurgency. Wait until they find out their new jobs require working. Southern fried wingnuts in Florida are turning off both voters and bigots.

Coming this Summer: The Fulton County Indictments! Why not now? Why is Fani Willis making us wait sooooo long?

Powerful judges seem to always be trying to strike a balance between lower ethics and larger paydays. About a week after his confirmation, Neil Gorsuch finally sold a couple million dollars' worth of future goodwill and friendship with a guy destined to bring dozens of cases before him. Gorsuch didn’t think to mention this transaction, nor did fellow Trump judge Matthew Kacsmaryk think to disclose between 5 to 25 million bucks worth of his camaraderie. Senator Ed Markey is calling on Clarence Thomas to resign, all because of his billionaire sugar buddy Harlan Crow.

Joan McCarter tells us that it’s time for Senator Dianne Feinstein to retire, primarily because Senator Joe Manchin won’t. No one knows what the hell Dick Durbin is doing, but everyone can see what Mitch McConnell has planned.